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5 Ways to Find True Love if You’re An Introvert (And Hate Dating)

Dating seems impossible at times, especially if you’re not used to putting yourself out there. I get it. It’s scary when you have to worry about putting your heart on the line. Not only that, but it’s a lot of hard work and an investment of time. You’ve discovered that even though you rarely find yourself actively dating, you’re still on the search for a meaningful connection with someone. Psych2Go shares with you 5 ways to find true love if you’re an introvert and hate dating:

1. Go to events and places that reflect your favorite hobbies and interests.

Forget hitting the bar or a club to meet people if that’s not where you feel like you can be your natural self. Meeting new people that you can potentially get to know over time requires a certain sense of confidence in you if you want to make things happen. By going to events and places that harbor your hobbies and interests, it’ll also be easier for you to strike up conversations based on similarities you and a stranger share. This can alleviate some of the stress introverts face when it comes to small talk, too.

2. Be prepared to go through trial and error.

Love isn’t a fairytale. And while you might hate the superficial aspects of dating, you certainly can’t go through it without getting your heart broken a few times or doing some of the breaking yourself. There will always be lessons learned in the world of dating. For instance, you might be used to internalizing your thoughts and feelings as an introvert, but through dating, you’ll learn to communicate them better with your partner. It’ll just be an ongoing process of learning how to do it effectively. And while that might be difficult at times, it isn’t impossible.

3. Have honest conversations.

Don’t be afraid to show who you are right from the beginning. As an introvert, you value authenticity and depth anyway. If you want to skip out on the phase of trying to impress one another, be honest. Have the difficult conversations. Ask them if they know where the both of you are headed. See if the two of you have actual chemistry, but also that you’re willing to make things work. If you’re serious about dating, you shouldn’t have to worry about waiting for a certain amount of time to pass before responding back to text messages or coming off as “desperate” or “clingy.” The point of being with someone is to see each other even on your worst days and still choosing one another every step of the way.

4. Only make time for people who you really believe you have a potential with.

Don’t date someone because they seem impressive on paper or if they’re someone your parents and friends will approve of. Ask yourself what you really want in a partner and only make time to meet up with people who you truly believe you can are compatible with. Because at the end of the day, it’s you who’s dating that person, not anyone else. As an introvert, you most likely don’t like creating conflict, but while it’s awful to reject others because you don’t see the two of you working out, it’ll help you be one step closer to finding the right match. Never settle either because you’re afraid to be alone.

5. Keep an open mind.

This includes dating extroverts who operate in a very different way. But, who’s to say it can’t work out when you’re dating someone who’s your opposite? The key word is “compromise.” As long as you and your partner respect each other’s boundaries, there’s no real reason as to why things can’t work out despite misunderstandings that may arise from time to time. That’s normal in any relationship and is to be expected.

Are you an introvert? What helps you in the realm of dating? Leave a comment down below!

Catherine Huang
Catherine Huang graduated from the University of Rhode Island with a BA in English. She has a penchant for storytelling, ramen, and psychology. Catherine is a writer for Psych2Go and looks forward to reaching out to its growing community, hoping to encourage others to tap into self-examination and confront life's challenges head on with the most difficult questions.

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