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10 Red Flags of an Abusive Relationship

When people think of abuse they often equate it to physical violence but that isn’t where abuse starts or ends. Abuse can be physical, mental, or emotional and everything in between. Anyone from any walk of life can be abused and anyone can be an abuser, there isn’t a type or a look when it comes to these things. It is important to understand what constitutes as abuse and what you can do about it if you come to the realization that you are being abused. Remember that a relationship is any connection that you have with another person be it work, school, romantic, a friendship, or just an acquaintance and that any one of these examples can have abuse within it. What follows is a list of 10 red flags you might run into if you are in an abusive relationship. This list is not meant to be the only red flags of abuse and if you feel that you are being abused please seek out help, there will be a short list of resources at the end of this article.

1. Extremely Controlling Behavior

In many abusive relationships the abuser will want to control every aspect of their victim’s life. They might want to know who their victim is talking to, who they are planning to meet up with, or where they are going. They may demand that their victim doesn’t talk to certain people, often for trivial reasons, and they may even want them to stop having contact with their own family. This controlling can even flow into them demanding what their victim wears, how their makeup looks, or how they carry themselves.

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  1. “LARRY” (2002)
    -called me every night to make me miss “Friends”
    -forbade me to interact with family, friends, acquaintances
    -made fresh remarks just to irritate me
    -guilted me into giving him one more chance, only to lose me in the end
    -tried to use the whole “Christmas spirit” think to manipulate me back into the friendship

    “PETER” (2004)
    -forcibly kissed me
    -wouldn’t let me out of his sight or grasp
    -pinched my arm nearly cutting off circulation, nearly broke my hand/neck
    -told me to “get comfortable with being uncomfortable”
    -an all around bully who got off on making me miserable!

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