Have you ever heard about the law of attraction?
It is a philosophy that suggests that positive thoughts bring positive results into a person’s life, while negative thoughts bring negative outcomes. Another way you could simplify it is: you attract what you are.
But how can you apply this into everyday life while hoping to attract people? By developing some small positive habits while in the company of others, you could make yourself seem more likable and attractive.
Here are five of those habits that attract people the most.
1. Practicing kindness
It is hard not to like a kind and giving person. They are warm and caring, and make everyone around them feel good. And they have no problems with attracting people!
A research published in the Evolutionary Psychology journal found that when women were presented with two groups of guys – one group that was described as being altruistic, and the second group without that description – they thought the altruistic group was more attractive and more desirable for a long term relationship.
So, being kind and altruistic could make you more attractive in people’s eyes, so go do something nice for somebody!
2. Being a good listener
You’ve probably met someone who only wants to talk about themselves and never listens to anything someone else has to say. Did you like that person? Not much, I guess!
Being ready to listen to others and pay your full attention to them is an important step to take if you want someone to be attracted to you. A study from Harvard University found that people like talking about themselves a lot – when they talk about what’s on their mind, their brains get filled with dopamine, one of many feel-good hormones. And on top of that, when you show them that you’re available for the conversation, imagine the chemistry rush that goes on in their brains!
By being a good listener, you are able to show others that you care about them and that you’re ready to give them your time and attention, which is incredibly attractive!
A research article from the Cognition and Emotion scientific journal wanted to explore a link between facial expressions and attraction. Participants were shown two photos of people with varying happiness expressions. Researchers found that photos of people with a bigger smile were seen as more attractive.
This basically means that smiling can make you more attractive! It exhibits joy, content and happiness, something that everyone is attracted to. So make sure to always have a smile on your face while being around people, they might fall for it!
4. Spreading positivity
Did you know that emotions can be spread around people? Psychologists call this emotional contagion. It means that emotions can jump from one person to another, and they can even spread through a whole group of people.
To take this to your advantage, try to be as positive as you can be, so that others catch on to your positivity and good vibes. This may be hard in moments you feel down, and that’s okay. But practicing positive thinking could help.
If you try to find good things about the world or people around you, and have a positive and open attitude, others will feel it. Your positive energy will make them feel good too, and they might get attracted to you as a result.
5. Giving compliments
Paying compliments to others could be a good way to express that you’re interested and attracted.
Research in psychology states that with the evolution of language may play the role in our need to attract potential partners and keep their interest in us going on. This is where compliments come into play – one of the most important verbal communication strategies.
It has also been shown that knowing someone likes us can make us like that person back. This is known as the reciprocity of liking effect. When you compliment someone and show your attraction openly, they will feel liked and probably start feeling attraction to you too.
But of course, you should be careful not to overdo your compliment giving, as it may backfire against you. Make sure you’re not complimenting a person too much, follow their body language to see if they’re feeling uneasy, and try to focus your compliments on personality. If you compliment their appearance, make sure you’re not sounding too pushy – for example, compliment their style choice rather than their body.
What do you think about these habits? Do you feel they could actually work? Are you ready to try them out?
While every person has a different taste and is attracted to different things, some things are universal when it comes to attraction. Smiling, kindness, nice words… it is something not many can stay immune to. These habits, along with being confident in yourself, are almost a guaranteed ticket into someone’s heart!
Thank you for reading!
Written by: Stela Košić
- Brogaard, B. (2017, September 27). 11 Predictors of Romantic Attraction. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-mysteries-love/201709/11-predictors-romantic-attraction
- Emery, L. R. (2018, July 23). 7 Daily Habits Of People Who Attract Long-Term Relationships. Bustle. https://www.bustle.com/p/7-daily-habits-of-people-who-attract-long-term-relationships-9844998
- Farrelly, D., Clemson, P., & Guthrie, M. (2016). Are Women’s Mate Preferences for Altruism Also Influenced by Physical Attractiveness? Evolutionary Psychology, 14(1), 147470491562369. https://doi.org/10.1177/1474704915623698
- Gao, Z., Yang, Q., Ma, X., Becker, B., Li, K., Zhou, F., & Kendrick, K. M. (2017). Men Who Compliment a Woman’s Appearance Using Metaphorical Language: Associations with Creativity, Masculinity, Intelligence and Attractiveness. Frontiers in Psychology, 8. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2017.02185
- Golle, J., Mast, F. W., & Lobmaier, J. S. (2013). Something to smile about: The interrelationship between attractiveness and emotional expression. Cognition and Emotion, 28(2), 298–310. https://doi.org/10.1080/02699931.2013.817383
- Gunther, R. (n.d.). How To Compliment A Man To Build Attraction. Flourish Together. https://www.flourishtogether.com/dating/how-to-compliment-a-man-to-build-attraction.html
- Montoya, R. M., & Horton, R. S. (2012). The reciprocity of liking effect. In M. A. Paludi (Ed.), The psychology of love (pp. 39–57). Praeger/ABC-CLIO.
- Steber, C. (2017, September 6). 15 Easy Ways To Attract More Love & Positivity Into Your Life. Bustle. https://www.bustle.com/p/15-easy-ways-to-attract-more-love-positivity-into-your-life-80975