Confidence is a tricky thing. Some people naturally seem to exude confidence, while others struggle to have any. And some of that is just who you are, some are naturally shy, and others are naturally loud. However, there are times when you need confidence. For example, meeting new people, giving a presentation or starting a new job. Confidence can be really useful and helps you to feel calm and assured in a situation where you might normally be panicky and flustered.
I am the first to admit I am not a confident person. It was always me that had trouble putting my hand up in class, leaving the comfort of my mum to actually go to school and talking in a group of people. I was always aware from a young age that I was shy. My Mum would introduce me to someone, I wouldn’t talk, and my Mum would say ‘oh Ash is just shy’. Which made me believe I could never be confident, because shy was my default. But shy people can learn to be confident, so Psych2Go shares with you 5 habits to boost self-confidence.
1) Asses yourself
Instead of staying in the fogginess that is lack of confidence, take stock. Forget thinking you need confidence, instead focus on what is it you want to achieve. Any time you feel a bit wobbly and sense yourself falling into ‘I’m hopeless, I can’t do it’ territory, stop and take a breath. Detach yourself from your emotions and analyse where you are, where you need to be, and what you need to learn. Keep assessing yourself. It’s important to keep everything in perspective. Before you do something that requires a lot of confidence, get into the habit of talking down the event. If you’ve got to give a presentation in front of 15 people, just think ‘15 people, that’s not even an entire high school class. If you keep assessing your feelings and emotions, it’s easier to keep everything under control and keeps you calm.
2) Don’t overthink it
If you’re in a situation that calls for confidence, you can often overthink it. But it’s important to keep a level head. Much like assessing yourself, make sure that everything is in perspective. If you can feel your brain spinning itself into a spiral, take a breath and push the thoughts away. Often if you keep pumping positive thoughts into your brain you will eventually believe them. So anytime you feel your brain changing up a gear and shifting into maximum overdrive, pause and think of all the positive things about yourself.
3) Create a mantra
Having a mantra can be really useful if you’re someone who likes routine. You can think of something that makes you feel good, for example a really simple ‘you got this’ can work really well. Choose your mantra depending on what phrase works for you. Once you have a mantra that you like, look in the mirror every morning and say it as many times as you feel you need. Eventually this will work its way into your morning routine and become a natural thing for you to do. Once this becomes a habit you’ll be amazed at how quickly you start to believe what you’re saying. Confidence comes from within.
4) Surround yourself with positive people
Confidence is all about positivity. If you want to be confident in yourself, you need to keep your thoughts positive and try not to get into a negative thought spiral. What can be really unhelpful is a negative presence in your life. When you’re trying to build your confidence, you don’t want someone bringing you down. Surrounding yourself with positive people will not only help your confidence and self-esteem, but it’ll will also make you happier. Cutting out negative people can be difficult but will be worthwhile in the long run.
5) Remind yourself of all your achievements
This is something I really struggle with. I have that whole British thing where we play down all our achievements until they’re basically worthless in our own minds. But this doesn’t help with my self-confidence. Because I didn’t have any faith or belief in my own abilities it was almost impossible for me to be confident doing anything. For example, when I was taking my exams I genuinely believed I’d fail every single one of them because I had no confidence in my academic abilities. But before each exam my Mum would remind me how brilliantly I did in my mocks and the grades that I was predicted. That really helped me, knowing that I’d achieved all that made my confidence climb higher.
What do you think?
How do you build your confidence? What tips have worked for you? Psych2Go would love to know! Be sure to leave a comment below!
If you enjoyed this article then you may also like 5 Psychological Tips to Build your Body Confidence or 8 Psychological Tips to Boost Self-Confidence
Dunn, C.W. (September 7, 2016) 10 Things You Can Do to Boost Self-Confidence, Entrepreneur Europe. Retrieved 16th May 2018.