According to relationship therapist Dr. Josie Rosario, relationships — be it platonic, romantic, or familial — cannot thrive without an emotional connection. This is because we as human beings are all hardwired to connect with one another. We want to belong, to be accepted, and to feel understood by those around us.
And while oftentimes it takes work and dedication to build that kind of bond with someone, other times, it just comes easily to us with certain people and we just…click! Having that kind of connection with someone is rare and special. So if something like that has happened to you recently and you need help making sense of it all, here are 5 psychology-backed signs that you have a real connection with someone, according to experts:
According to relationship therapist Dr. Barbara Spinelli, when you encounter someone you have a real connection with, it can feel a lot like meeting yourself. Maybe you both came from similar backgrounds, or you have similar ways of viewing the world. Whatever it is, something about them just draws you in. And this attraction is more emotional or spiritual in nature than it is romantic. You just love their company because it feels easy and natural, being with them. Even though you may not have known each other for very long, you already feel so close and comfortable around them.
There’s a quote from the British television series Doctor Who that perfectly illustrates this point. It goes, “Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?” And while most people might not be able to relate, you do. Because your connection with a certain someone is just so strong that it makes you completely certain about your feelings for them. According to psychologist Dr. Lisa Vallejos, this happens when you know that you’re not just in each other’s lives because it’s convenient or mutually beneficial, but rather, that you want to be in each other’s lives and purposefully make space for one another.
3. Emotional Fulfillment
Do you care about each other’s emotional needs and try to fulfill them? Do you feel their emotions as if they were your own? If the answer is yes, then you have a real connection with this person. Because according to psychologist Dr. Tracie Pinnock, having an emotional connection with someone naturally means wanting to fulfil their emotional needs and make them happy. So when they’re unhappy or unfulfilled, we feel it just as strongly as if it were happening to us.
4. Emotional Intimacy
According to relationship coach and expert Julie Nguyen, to truly love and connect with someone is to know them deeply. So when you have a real connection with someone, you open up yourself to them freely. You have deep conversations with them and you really listen to one another. You feel comfortable sharing your values, beliefs, and dreams with each other, and you’ve seen each other through all your flaws and struggles.
5. Inner Healing
Last but certainly not the least, having a true connection with someone can be incredibly healing. According to Dr. Spinelli, a real connection with someone should bring you inner peace and comfort. It should inspire you to grow and help you work through your triggers, insecurities, and emotional turmoil. Because when you deeply connect with someone, they become a safe space for you to truly be and express yourself. And once you see yourself, you will see the ways to become even better.
So, do you relate to any of the signs we’ve mentioned here? Have you ever met someone you felt an unexplained connection to?
If this video helped you to realize that you truly have a deep and meaningful connection with someone, then you should consider yourself very lucky. Not everyone is fortunate enough to have someone in their lives who makes them feel like they are truly loved, accepted, and understood, and many of us spend years trying to find that kind of emotional connection with someone else.
Let us know in the comments what are some other signs that made you realize your connection with someone was real, and what you think it means to deeply and truly connect with someone.
- de Bellefonds, C. & Brito, J. (2021, Jul 7). What’s a Twin Flame, and How Do You Know If You Found Yours? Healthline. https://www.healthline.com/health/mind-body/twin-flame#signs
- Nguyen, J. & Overstreet, K. (2022, Dec 13). How To Know If You Have An Emotional Connection With Someone. MindBodyGreen. https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/how-to-know-if-you-have-emotional-connection-with-someone
- Sabater, V. (2021, Nov 15). The Psychology of Connection: The Art of Connecting with People from the Heart. Exploring Your Mind. https://exploringyourmind.com/psychology-connection-art-connecting-people-heart/