Hello, Psych2goers. We’re going to explore how it is like when someone is an asexual partner in this article. If you’d like to know more about asexuals and relationships, you might also be interested in a previous one of “How To Recognize Love as An Asexual”. We recognize asexuality is a complicated term, so the following may vary from partner to partner.
1. Adjust anticipations
Many asexuals are not interested in sex as a validation between two people, although their partners might be. Therefore, it is crucial to think about other ways to maintain a healthy relationship and change the expectations (Khoo, 2017).
2. Take it slow
Once you know you are dating an asexual, be patient and try to understand their thoughts gradually. If you try to hurry your relationship and do not reflect what’s going on in their mind, they may end up disliking you instead (Khoo, 2017).
3. Enjoy intimacy differently
There are countless ways to enjoy life when your partner is an asexual and not necessarily interested in sex. For example, going on a coffee date, kisses and sharing hugs are great alternatives to express intimacy and warmth (Khoo, 2017).
4. Discuss needs and boundaries
Communication is key to any type of relationship, but an asexual partner can still desire a limited amount of sex. It is never a bad idea to talk it out and manage your needs and boundaries in a relationship (Rezaiyan, 2019).
5. Accept it
There is nothing wrong with asexuality. If you happen to find out that your partner is asexual and willing to stay by their side, your care and acceptance play a significant role in supporting them (Rezaiyan, 2019).
6. Re-assess the meaning
As you date an asexual, think of the meaning behind this relationship. Is it just for a sexual relationship? What’s the reason that we are together? If your relationship is relatively less traditional, some may seek pleasure through other partners. It really differs on individuals (Collins, 2016).
What do you think of the points above? Let us know in the comments!
Collins, S. (2016, November 5). You Found Out Your Partner’s Asexual – Now What? 5 Relationship Tips for You. Everyday Feminism. https://everydayfeminism.com/2016/11/partners-asexual-now-what/
Khoo, I. (2017, June 26). How To Make A Relationship Work If Your Partner Is Asexual. Huffington Post. https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2017/06/23/asexual-partner_a_22716158/
Rezaiyan, A. (2019, October 16). So Your Partner is Asexual – How Do You Cope? Silicon Marriage Counselling. https://siliconvalleymarriagecounseling.com/so-your-partner-is-asexual-how-do-you-cope/