When you ask your friends whether you should break up with your partner, is their reply always: “Do it.”?

As much as relationships make you happy, they can also be the reason for your demise.

Especially when you’re in one that’s falling apart.

But when exactly does it get to that stage?

Is your relationship beyond saving?

1. You are both quick to get angry.

How often do you and your partner fight?

If you’re here then there’s a high chance the answer is “A LOT.”

Do you notice that your temper (as well as your partner’s) is getting shorter and shorter?

You may feel like they’re not listening to you, so you confront them about the problem.

But what does it lead to? More fights.

How exactly did it reach that way?

To begin with, compromise is a necessary part of any relationship.

Let’s go back to the early stages. You probably had so much patience for each other, right? It must’ve seemed like you could conquer whatever you thought was going your way.

For two people to work together as a team, each person has to give and take once in a while (Di Meglio, 2021).

The problem arises when no one in the relationship wants to compromise anymore.

Are both of you getting increasingly hard-headed?

Can you remember the last time your argument ended in a calm, mature manner?

You may notice that a lot of times, the main issue isn’t even resolved anymore.

Instead, more issues stem from it.

This may be an indication that both of you are not having your needs met, and in your almost haphazard way of dealing with it, results such as conflict and frustration are produced.

You may find it helpful to give each other some space or reach out to a licensed therapist for relationship help.

2. Your self-esteem is decreasing.

When you think of yourself, do you feel empowered?

Do you have a strong sense of independence, love, and maturity?

Relationships are made out of mutual affection. Both of you are naturally satisfying each other’s needs and creating a happy and comfortable environment to grow.

But if you look in the mirror and no longer see the capable, powerful human staring back, there needs to be a reevaluation.

Do you find yourself lacking the desire to dress up constantly, feeling tired and drained, having pity for yourself, or comparing your own relationship to others?

It may be a huge indication that you have low self-esteem brought by an unsupportive partner.

Having bad days is normal. Even celebrities have them.

But when you do have your bad days, it’s always good to have someone that understands and cares for you, rather than someone who brings you down further.

3. You lack affection and intimacy.

Do you notice a significant decrease in your ways of affection?

Meaning, do you still call each other cute names? Sneak kisses here and there? Or have sex?

Sometimes, the two people involved don’t notice the huge rift that’s forming between them.

But other people certainly do.

When your friends are suddenly asking you things like “Hey, are you okay?”, “Do you wanna talk about it?”, or “Are things okay between you and your partner?” it usually means there’s something going on, and it isn’t good.

It might be good to do a self-check as well as an evaluation of your current relationship. Are you still happy being in it?

If your answer is anything other than yes then you probably need to talk to your partner so you can discuss the problem as a team.

4. You want to do anything but them.

Yes, the double meaning is intentional.

Couples who are on the verge of breaking up mostly avoid each other’s presence like the plague.

This is because the mere sight of the other person brings back feelings of irritation, tiredness, and sometimes anger.

This is a bad spot to be in a relationship. It probably means that no amount of discussion can resolve any issues because it always ends up in fights.

You don’t want to spend time with each other, and when you do, all you want is to get away.

Your significant other becomes your significant bother. Yikes.

5. Your partner is more interested in someone else.

Without a doubt, this situation hurts a lot.

For some, it might be the most painful.

Ever feel like your partner cherishes another person more than you?

It’s probably because they do. And sometimes, it’s better to internalize that hard truth than to give meaningless excuses.

Do they talk about other people often? Do they compare you? Do you notice their secrets and hidden messages?

It sucks, but if you see them treating someone else the way they used to treat you, they’ve most probably moved on while still being in your relationship.

Or, they’re looking for ways to sabotage it in order to end it.

When you notice that your partner is putting you in this situation (whether they’ve cheated or you feel like they’re about to), it’s best to be upfront about it.

Tell them what you feel, and tell them what your next step will be.

6. You’re always thinking about the past.

Where did it go wrong?

Should you have done better?

These are the kinds of thoughts you probably have right now.

You may feel quite lonely and jealous of other people with better circumstances.

If you’ve reached this kind of state, it most likely means that you’ve encountered some problems in the relationship that were dismissed by you or your partner.

Those problems, no matter how small they seem, tend to grow over time.

This is why healthy communication is important.

Relationships are not always rainbows and unicorns.

Sometimes, they’re weeds and soil that you have to nurture in order to have something growing and healthy.

So if you’re often sad or crying about how bad the situation is, always remember that there is a chance to make things right.

There is always room for development, whether it’s with your partner or not.

7. You have a break-up plan.

A dying relationship most probably has encountered a break-up or two.

Or many.

Even though you’re still in the relationship, do you have constant thoughts of breaking it off?

You and your partner probably already know that it’s time to say goodbye, but don’t want to risk it or don’t know how.

How will you do it?

Is it the right choice?

Are you going to regret it?

These constant what-ifs are why impulsive break-ups happen. You break up in the spur of the moment and get back together the next day because you didn’t anticipate the fearful repercussions.

Keep in mind that no breakups are good. It’s sad in nature.

But, it may be the solution for you to be better. To feel better.

So take your time.

And when you’re ready, think of what you truly deserve.

Here’s 8 Reasons To Break Up With Someone.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

Do you think you are in a dying relationship?

Which point did you relate to?

Please don’t hesitate to share your stories in the comment section below. We appreciate hearing about your experiences.

If you know someone who’s also in the same boat, then please share this with them. Maybe it can help.

Thank you so much for reading. Until next time!

REFERENCES

Baumgerner, L. (2019, September 4). Signs Your Relationship is Falling Apart | Trinity Relationship Center | FL. Trinity Relationship Center. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://trinityrelationshipcenter.com/signs-your-relationship-is-falling-apart/

Curry, A. (2021, July 8). Healthy and Unhealthy Compromise in Relationships. Naya Clinics. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.nayaclinics.com/post/healthy-and-unhealthy-compromise-in-relationship

di Meglio, F. (2021, May 7). This Is How To Compromise in Your Marriage. Brides. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.brides.com/how-to-compromise-in-marriage-or-your-relationship-2492464

Farmer, V. (2011, February 7). The Role Of Affection In Romantic Relationships. Dr. Val Farmer. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from http://www.valfarmer.com/article.ec?DocID=1286

Firestone, L. (2016, August 8). 7 Behaviors That Ruin a Relationship. Psychology Today. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201608/7-behaviors-ruin-relationship

Gillihan, S., Ph. D. (2018, February 21). Why Do Couples Fight—and How Can They Stop? Psychology Today. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/think-act-be/201802/why-do-couples-fight-and-how-can-they-stop#:%7E:text=Couples%20often%20get%20stuck%20in,more%20harmonious%20and%20fulfilling%20relationships.

Howard, L. (2019, January 23). Here’s How Experts Define Healthy Communication In A Relationship. Bustle. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.bustle.com/p/heres-how-experts-define-healthy-communication-in-a-relationship-15830872

Kahn, N. (2021, November 19). Sagittarius Zodiac Signs’ Biggest Weaknesses, According To An Astrologer. Bustle. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.bustle.com/life/sagittarius-zodiac-signs-biggest-weaknesses-astrologer

Leonard, J. (2021, May 6). Relationship depression: How to cope. Medical News Today. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/relationship-depression#impact

Steber, C. (2021, June 14). 11 Signs Your Partner Isn’t As Supportive In Your Relationship As They Should Be. Bustle. Retrieved December 6, 2021, from https://www.bustle.com/wellness/signs-your-partner-isnt-as-supportive-in-your-relationship-as-they-should-be

7 Signs Your Relationship Is Falling Apart

1. You are both quick to get angry.

2. Your self-esteem is decreasing.

3. You lack affection and intimacy.

4. You want to do anything but them.

5. Your partner is more interested in someone else.

6. You’re always thinking about the past.

7. You have a break-up plan.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

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Responses

1. You are both quick to get angry.

2. Your self-esteem is decreasing.

3. You lack affection and intimacy.

4. You want to do anything but them.

5. Your partner is more interested in someone else.

6. You’re always thinking about the past.

7. You have a break-up plan.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

READ MORE

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Responses