7 Signs You’re Not Broken, It’s Your Unhealed Trauma

Have you ever had a traumatic experience in your life? Even if you’ve never been in an accident, had your life threatened, or been in any serious physical danger, the answer can still be yes. A traumatic experience can refer to any situation that evokes an intense, overwhelming, and long-lasting sense of fear, anxiety, and stress. 

Emotional and psychological trauma is something unfortunately a lot of people go through, and it’s no less real or no less serious than the trauma that can be inflicted by physical harm. If left unresolved, trauma in any form can manifest in negative cognitive, behavioral, or even physiological ways.

With that said, here are 7 signs that  you are not broken, but may be struggling with some unhealed trauma:

1. You were in a toxic relationship.

According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (2013), 1 out of every 3 teens will experience being in an unhealthy relationship, but only 33% of them will seek help or confide in someone else about it. This is most likely because, while it might be easy to spot toxic relationships from afar, it’s a lot harder to do up close and personal, especially with our own feelings clouding our judgment. And living with the emotional baggage a toxic relationship brings can lead to a lot of problematic behaviors that make it more difficult for us to connect with other people in a healthy, meaningful, and emotionally intimate way. 

2. You suffered a significant loss.

Another reason why a lot of people may suffer from psychological trauma is if they have recently experienced a significant loss in their lives that they don’t know how to deal with. Grief, if left unresolved, can lead us to become more detached and isolate ourselves from those around us. It may make it more difficult to sleep, concentrate, or think clearly. And it could lead us to become more moody and emotionally volatile, prone to lashing out or breaking down over seemingly nothing (Herman, 1998).

3. You have certain triggers.

Even if you feel that you’ve already moved on from your difficult past, unresolved trauma may still linger in your subconscious and form triggers. Triggers are defined as provocative content, images, or speech that evokes an immediate emotional or psychological response, such as panic, anxiety, stress, tension, dissociation, or extreme discomfort. So when you feel triggered by things that you may or may not associate with a traumatic event in your life, then there’s most likely still some unhealed trauma blocking your path towards complete mental, physical, and emotional well-being. 

4. You have unexplained symptoms.

Similar to the last point, unexplained somatic symptoms are our mind’s way of telling us that while we might think nothing is wrong, we might still be harboring some psychological wounds that need tending to. So if you’ve been having symptoms lately that you or your doctor just can’t explain — such as migraines, muscle tension, body aches, insomnia, loss of appetite, memory loss, difficulty concentrating, fatigue, low energy, and depressive affect — you might be better off speaking to a therapist about it than a physician, as these are all common in patients suffering from PTSD (American Psychological Association, 2013).

5. You struggle with emotional intimacy.

Do you find it difficult to open up and trust even your closest friends and family members? Do you struggle to maintain close long-term relationships in your life? Or feel uncomfortable expressing your true feelings to others? This fear of emotional intimacy and vulnerability may stem from a previous traumatic experience in your life that you have not yet come to terms with. After all, trauma has the power to impact not only how we feel about ourselves but also how we relate to other people (Bower & Silvers, 1998). 

6. You suffer from feelings of depression.

Although many people might not be aware of it, there’s actually a difference between feeling depressed and being depressed. In certain situations (such as following the death of a loved one, a major calamity, illness, injury, and so on), it’s perfectly normal to wrestle with such feelings. So if you find yourself feeling depressed after having experienced a traumatic event, no matter how long ago it might have been, then it might be your mind’s way of telling you that something’s not right and that there may still be some issues there you’ve left unresolved (David, Ceschi, Billieux & Van der Linden, 2008).

7. You have unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Last but certainly not the least, even if you feel that none of the things we’ve talked about so far apply to you, if you have any unhealthy coping mechanisms for your personal problems, then that’s as clear a sign as any that you are still struggling with some unhealed trauma. Alcoholism, substance abuse, gambling, overspending, overeating, socially withdrawing, and self-harming are just a few of the most common examples. Often times, we turn to these problematic coping mechanisms when we don’t want to acknowledge or don’t know how to process what it is we’re feeling and what to do about it. 

So if you have any unresolved trauma in your life, reach out to a mental healthcare professional today so you can better understand your trauma and how it is affecting your life. Healing from trauma takes time, but seeking help is the first step towards recovery. 

References:

• USA.gov. “Teen Dating Violence.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Accessed April 22, 2014. 
• Herman, J. L. (1998). Recovery from psychological trauma. Psychiatry and Clinical Neurosciences, 52(S1), S98-S103.
• American Psychological Association (2013). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th Ed). Washington, DC; APA Publishing.
• Bower, G. H., & Sivers, H. (1998). Cognitive impact of traumatic events. Development and psychopathology, 10(4), 625-653.
• David, M., Ceschi, G., Billieux, J., & Van der Linden, M. (2008). Depressive symptoms after trauma: is self-esteem a mediating factor?. The Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, 196(10), 735-742.