7 Things That You Do That Make People Dislike You

Relationships can be incredibly difficult to navigate. You may find some people seem to look the other way around you and you can’t help but wonder why. While there are some things you can do to improve yourself and your likeability, there are other parts that you have to accept in yourself. To better explore both of these aspects, in this article we will be looking at 7 things you do that make people dislike you.

1. Being Fake

You’ve probably heard the phrase “be yourself” as a piece of advice when you’re meeting new people. This is very true as it gives you the opportunity to show how colorful and unique you are. On the other hand, when you try to be someone you’re not, it can come across as inauthentic and make someone wary of you and your intentions. It’s better to be your authentic self as you’ll find that people that do like you, like you for who you are. While being yourself doesn’t neccesarily mean you’ll be the most popular in the room, you’ll find that the friendships that come out of it are much stronger than those built on a facade.

2. Being One-Sided 

Conversations and relationships with people should be a two-way street. While it’s no secret that being selfish, taking advantage of others, and not letting others speak will make them dislike you, the reverse can be true as well. Letting someone else do all the talking, and providing no input from your point of view is typically less favorable. Having a back and forth nature to conversations, letting others speak their perspective and you responding with your own is more favorable than a one-sided interrogation. Create dialogue instead of monologue.

3. Not Smiling

Smiling has numerous benefits outside of social situations, including improving your overall mood. Did you know that smiling can make you more attractive to other people? Wearing a smile can make you appear more approachable and friendly than if you’re frowning. While sometimes it can be hard to keep track of what your face is doing, you may find it makes a difference in how people interact with you. After all, people pay close attention to your non-verbal expressions.

4. Getting Too Personal Right Away

As social beings, we rely on others for support and the closer we are to people, the more we’re willing to let them in on. This is important for many reasons, however so is the timing. Telling your best friend of 10 years something really personal is different from a person you met 10 minutes ago. Doing this can be off-putting, and can lead a person to judge you in a way that person who knows your full story wouldn’t. Let someone get to know you first and understand you as a person before letting them in on all your secrets.

5. Bragging

While sometimes it’s nice to flex some of your wonderful achievements on others, there’s a time and place for everything and bragging can be a huge turn off when used in the wrong situation. Talking too much about yourself and your achievements can come off as self-centeredness and create a sense of superiority that drives others away. While this may seem obvious, do know that this isn’t the only way to brag. Humblebragging is another behavior that essentially is the same action although it’s under a different veil. People that humblebrag do so by self-criticizing a positive attribute about themselves. For example, if you tell someone that you care too much about a project and that’s why your group members have a difficult time getting along with you, you’re essentially boasting that you have a great work ethic but are disguising it as self-deprecation.

6. Being Threatening

A person can feel threatened by you for reasons beyond the obvious. Perhaps you have something that the other person does not and jealousy comes into play. Maybe they’re insecure about something within themself and project it onto you. So unless you are actively doing something that can potentially harm a person, sometimes people may dislike you because of something they are lacking. This isn’t the only way you can appear threatening, your body language, tone of voice, and what you talk about are important as well. Making sure you keep your body open to others, and work to make your peers more comfortable can help.

7. Being Yourself

We promise this isn’t attacking you, please hear us out! While this may be a surprising point, it’s true that sometimes being who you are will turn others away. This situation can come about through many factors. In many cases, certain people have different preferences in a person that perhaps do not align with your personality. While it’s important to know that you can improve yourself, especially if you’re doing something that is harmful, it should not come at the expense where you are pretending to be someone else (see point number 1). Sometimes you may just be incompatible with certain groups, and that’s ok. You can improve what you can change, but also accept what you cannot. When you act like your authentic self, you may find that it drives some people away, however you may also pull in people who accept and love who you are. After all, quality of friendships are more important than quantity.

It is impossible to have every single person to like you. While there are things you can improve upon within yourself, there are others that you’ll have to accept. Even though you may find that some of what you do will push others away, you may find that it will attract others to you and build connections much stronger than the other way. We hope you found this article informative and ask that you share your thoughts with us in the comment section.

References:

• Arluck, K. (2018, September 13). Why Would People Dislike a Nice Person? PsychologyToday. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/ask-the-therapist/201809/why-would-people-dislike-nice-person
• DesMarais, C. (2021, January 5). The One Simple Thing Which Can Make You More Likeable. Inc.Com. https://www.inc.com/christina-desmarais/the-one-simple-thing-which-can-make-you-more-likeable.html#:%7E:text=Seeing%20you%20smile%20makes%20other%20people%20feel%20good.&text=By%20%22trying%20on%22%20another%20person%E2%80%99s,that%20expression%20in%20the%20past%3E
• Radwan, M. (2006). 7 reasons people dislike you for no reason | 2KnowMySelf. 2KnowMySelf. https://www.2knowmyself.com/7_reasons_people_dislike_you_for_no_reason
• Royse, M. (2022, January 6). If You Do These 5 Things, People Will Instantly Dislike You | Better Advice. Medium. https://medium.com/better-advice/if-you-do-these-5-things-people-will-instantly-dislike-you-3c7771cc9675
• Valentine, M. (2019, August 30). 7 Things You’re Doing that Make People Dislike You Immediately. Goalcast. https://www.goalcast.com/things-youre-doing-make-people-dislike-you/