Hey, Psych2Goers! Thanks for joining me again! I’m really excited you’re here, because we’re talking about one of my favorite topics: personalities! It’s what gives us our little sparkle of individuality, and most, if not all, of us would like to believe we have a winning one. So how do we know if we really do have a great personality? Let’s take a look at 9 signs you have a beautiful personality that attracts others.
Side note: This article is composed of both psychology information and personal opinions, so please don’t take the information too seriously or as an attack on any individual’s looks or personality. If you identify with any points here, please reach out to a mental health professional to discuss more in depth.
#1: You’re successful in other areas of your life.
In 2008 at the University of Wisconsin, Borghans, Duckworth, Heckman, and Bas ter Weel found that individuals with more positive personality traits are more likely to be successful in areas relating to economics. This means you might be successful in your work life or anything involving a give or take (like a relationship). Think about your social life and think about other areas in your life (like work, family, or financials). Are you doing pretty well in these areas? This success might be due to your personality (and good work ethic, of course!).
#2: You acknowledge everyone and treat everyone equally.
We all have our squad that we feel most comfortable with. When we’re comfortable, it makes it easier to show positive personality traits. The real test is in how we treat people who may not be a part of our normal circle. Are you nice to someone only when you need something? If someone you don’t know says hello to you, do you smile and say hi back? When you’re hanging out with a group, do you ignore all except one or two people, or do you make sure everyone is included? Depending on your answers to these questions, it can be an indicator of if you have an attractive personality.
#3: You have good manners.
Okay, for this one, I’m not talking about anything crazy like always having perfect posture, knowing which fork to use at a fancy restaurant, or how to curtsy. I’m talking about the basics. Using simple gestures of good manners, such as saying “please” and “thank you”, can show others that you respect them. When you show respect to others, naturally they want to be around you more often.
#4: You show gratitude and appreciation.
We just talked about having good manners. When someone does something for you, you’re thanking them for going out of their way to do something for you. You are telling them you are grateful for what they did and that you appreciate it. You can even show gratitude and appreciation just for someone sharing their time with you. When you act in a selfless way and do not assume that you are entitled to these acts or people’s time, they are much more willing to give it. Think about it! If a friend keeps asking you for stuff or to do things for them, but you never get anything in return (not even a thank you), do you still want to be around that person?
#5: You have good conversational skills.
Have you ever been talking to someone, looked at the time, and said “Oh wow! I can’t believe we’ve been talking for 3 hours!” That’s probably because you and/or the person you’re talking to have good conversational skills. The conversation isn’t monopolized by one person, and the topics are interesting and relevant to the conversation. This also includes body language if you’re in person. If you’re talking to someone who is making eye contact, has their body facing towards you, and isn’t distracted, you’ll enjoy the conversation much more than trying to talk to someone with their face in their phone.
#6: You’re also a good listener.
Having a conversation, much like a relationship, is a give and take scenario. Sure, you have things to say, but a big part of having a successful and enjoyable conversation is listening to what the other person or people has to say. Signs of a good listener can be not interrupting the other person, asking follow up questions to show you heard what they said and are interested, and repeating what they said back to them. These types of conversations are fun and can really help bring people together!
#7: You’re a drama-free zone!
Think about your friend group. Is there one person who always is either gossiping, talking about something negative, or starting drama with others? If you recognize that person in your friend group, do you like hanging out with them? Personally, I really don’t like to gossip. Even if I don’t like someone a friend is gossiping about, I will still ask them to change topics. It’s draining and kind of kills the vibe. When you are a positive person who doesn’t partake in or start negative situations, other’s want to be around this type of energy.
#8: You’re open-minded.
I don’t think there’s one person in this world that likes to be told they’re wrong. I know I don’t. That’s why I typically don’t like hanging around anyone who is a self-proclaimed know-it-all. When groups of people get together, a lot of the time the conversation is around experiences or opinions. If someone in that group is correcting people or insisting their opinion is correct, it a bit of a downer. Being open and inviting to all types of people and opinions is a true indicator that your personality brings all the friends to the yard!
#9: You are authentic and 100% YOU!
Before the pandemic, I decided to dye my hair bright teal, and I LOVED it! I had a coworker who I became friends with, and she also liked to dye her hair bright colors. Her hair was pink. About a week after I had my hair dyed, my coworker came into work with the EXACT SAME COLOR HAIR AS ME. I was shocked to say the least. After that, I’ll be honest, I stopped talking to and hanging out with her as much. I didn’t want to see things that I used to express my individuality being copied. The people you hang out with (should) hang out with you because they love who YOU are, not what you have, what you look like, or what you do. Fake it ‘til you make it doesn’t work with attracting friends. Try being yourself, and see how many people want to be around you.
Well, Psych2Goers, what do you think? Is the old saying true that more flies are attracted with honey rather than vinegar? Do you have some personality traits that could be worked on? If so, let us know in the comments below. As always, keep your eye on Psi for more Psych2Go content.
Have a wonderful day!
Need more info on having a likeable personality? Check out 5 Signs You’re More Likeable Than You Think!
The references used in and to compose this article are referenced below.
Anderson, O. (2021, November 7). 10 signs you have an attractive personality. Medium. Retrieved April 22, 2022, from https://medium.com/life-mission/10-signs-you-have-an-attractive-personality-c4165501ee82
Brown, L. (2022, April 19). 12 signs of people with true inner beauty. Hack Spirit. Retrieved April 22, 2022, from https://hackspirit.com/signs-of-inner-beauty/
Duckworth, A. L., Heckman, J. J., & ter Weel, B. (2006, December). The Economics and Psychology of Personality Traits. Journal of Human Resources. Retrieved April 22, 2022, from http://jhr.uwpress.org/content/43/4/972.short