9 Toxic Beliefs That Sabotage Your Relationships

(If you can relate to any of these signs, please do not take this feedback as an attack on your or others’ character. This article was meant to be a self-improvement guide for those of you who have been feeling a little stuck.)

Maintaining a healthy balance in a relationship can be difficult. Unfortunately, many toxic beliefs might get in the way and induce difficulties between you and your loved one. Do you have difficulties in your relationship because one or both of you harbor harmful beliefs?

Unfortunately, you’re not the only one who has experienced this. According to Psych Central, dynamics, practices, beliefs, sentiments, repressed memories and emotions collaborate. It’s easy to become overwhelmed when dealing with all of your past and present problems, but it may be done by adopting a new perspective.

In this article, we want to share with you 9 toxic beliefs that sabotage your relationships. These are destructive thoughts that can lead us into a spiral of negativity and hopelessness, but there’s good news! You can learn to identify these beliefs for what they are and replace them with something beneficial for one another so that you can build stronger and healthier relationships. So let’s jump in!

1. “I feel like you’re not the same person I fell in love with.”

Even though you may truly believe that your partner has changed for the worse, this belief can be toxic. The truth is personal values and attitudes are constantly evolving beyond someone’s control. Putting pressure on anyone to remain unchanged can result in resentment and frustration. People change naturally over time, so if something bothers you about their behavior, instead of judging them or trying to change them into who you want them to be, it’s better to understand why they act the way they do.

2. “If things don’t go my way, I get upset.”

It’s easy to get worked up when circumstances aren’t ideal since no one likes feeling disappointed or frustrated. However, the way you channel these emotions has a big impact on your relationship. If you’re a person who is easily triggered by detestable matters, then it’s time to take a step back and assess where this anger comes from because it may be rooted in resentment or fear of loss. Also, try to visualize how much happier you will feel if those triggers aren’t there anymore so that you can come up with practical solutions for changing the situation instead of getting upset every time something doesn’t go as planned.

3. “I always have to know what’s going on.”

Curiosity is healthy but being overbearing is not! Letting your partner have their own space allows them to grow as an individual without feeling suffocated. It’s true that it may sometimes be challenging when you don’t know what your partner is doing with their time, but that’s their decision to make. The more you attempt to control them in this respect, the less they will value your relationship and want to spend time with you.

4. “I hate when my partner neglects me or ignores me.”

Being ignored can feel like a punch in the gut since it causes feelings of rejection and devaluation by others. However, in some cases, being neglected isn’t always intentional. For instance, if your partner just started their own business, then they are probably super busy all of the time which makes for very little time together. If they’re not ignoring you on purpose then try not to take it personally and instead be understanding of their situation. If you need more attention, let them know how you feel and find ways to spend time together.

5. “My significant other never does anything nice for me!”

It’s always favorable to get creative by doing some things out of the ordinary for your partner. However, you don’t have to spend money on them in order to show that you care. Instead, you can go out of your way by doing something spontaneous or showing affection in ways that are unexpected especially since it can help build intimacy between the two of you.

6. “My significant other isn’t good enough for me.”

In some cases, people tend to compare themselves with their partners and think they are lacking what it takes to make their relationship work. Although it’s reasonable to expect that your partner should meet some of your needs, they aren’t always capable of giving you everything you want all the time. If this is something that bothers you, you may find a suitable time to discuss with them what you need and try coming up with compromises so everyone can get what they want.

7. “My love means he/she is obligated to love me back!”

Love isn’t about money or convincing someone to stay with you by making them feel indebted to you. Forcing someone to love you the equal way as you love them can possibly ruin a relationship. Loving each other freely without expecting something in return makes it all the more special when reciprocated!

8. “You should know what I’m thinking and feeling!”

You’re probably concerned it’s better if your partner knows how you feel about certain things, but sharing too much information can actually make them feel stressed out trying to understand you more than anything else. It’s impossible for your loved ones to completely and telepathically know your thoughts and feeling when knowing someone fully takes time and real effort on both parties. Above all, understanding each others’ thoughts and feelings by starting and maintaining valuable communication with them might bring you closer together emotionally in the long run.

9. “We both must be happy all the time and if one of us isn’t, it means we’re not meant to be together.”

In a relationship between two people, there are going to be ups and downs no matter how compatible you might seem at first glance or how much you get along with each other in general. So ultimately, being happy all of the time doesn’t sound very realistic given that life is full of changes and challenges you have to face together. Living happily ever after looks something more like this: sharing your experiences, both good and bad, with your loved ones to discover new solutions and make decisions. It is impossible to expect someone else to make you happy all the time when it’s part of every human’s responsibility to figure out how to be content.

No relationship is perfect because people always have some degree of doubt, but sometimes these fears can become overwhelming and start affecting other parts of your life. In order to get around this problem, it’s important to identify what you’re afraid of before confronting the issue head-on with honesty and trust. By doing so, you can work through problems together by giving each other support and discussing any issues that may arise in a healthy manner. Remember, relationships take a lot of effort from both parties involved so it’s normal for there to be bumps along the way!

What are your thoughts on this article? Leave a comment below and let us know! Thank you for reading!

References

  1. Tayloe, D. (2021, August 24). 15 Toxic Beliefs That Sabotage Your Relationships. Power of Positivity. https://www.powerofpositivity.com/toxic-beliefs-sabotage-relationships/

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