We all wish friendships would last forever, but the truth is most don’t. Losing a close friend feels like a heartbreak, it’s painful. At first it feels surreal because it isn’t as obvious. You think you are making it up in your mind. Not wanting to accept it because then it’s real. Instead you try to save the friendship by negotiating to no avail. Seeing that they don’t even bother to reply despite being active online feels like a shot to the heart.
When reality sinks in you feel anger and betrayed. You have been there for them and can’t comprehend why they decided to ignore you. Once you accept it’s over. Grief settles in. It feels like you are holding a funeral for someone who is alive. A person who will always remind you of the friendship you once had.
As painful as it is, letting go is okay. Some friendships will not stand the test of time. Friends can grow apart for many reasons, such as; distance, time management, one sided friendship, different life paths, and maturity, etc. There are an infinite number of reasons a friendship can end. It is important to not take full responsibility because it takes two people to form a friendship.
The following is a list of things you can do to let go of your best friend:
- Don’t second guess your decision.
- Recognize its okay to go your separate ways.
- Take your time and validate your feelings.
- Don’t fixate on your grief for too long, but allow yourself to feel.
- Don’t expect an apology or an explanation.
- Don’t take it personal and avoid blaming yourself.
- Minimize your contact with them, if possible cut all communication.
- Avoid daydreaming about what might have been.
- Recognize and accept the reasons for parting ways.
- Give yourself permission to move on.
- Write a goodbye letter you don’t have to send it. This will symbolize the closing of a friendship.
- Reflect on the lesson, you can always learn something.
- Find forgiveness for the both of you. It doesn’t excuse any wrong doing that might have happened. It simply helps you move on.
- Cherish the fun memories and don’t hold bitterness in your heart.
- Find support from your other friends. Share your feelings with them.
- Use your energy to focus on your other friendships.
- Accept invitations from acquaintances. You never know, a great friendship might be born.
- Let new people in.
- Treat yourself with kindness.
Despite whichever way your friendship might have ended. Realize that some people are meant to stay in your heart and not in your life. Smile because it happened. Be glad they were a part of your life. Must of all when you bid farewell be thankful because they once brought happiness. Have solace that even though some friendships end. There will always be that one friend that no matter how far you may be. They will always be there.
Feel free to read: How To Get By Without Friends
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