Getting Along with Peers Even if You Aren’t Friends
Let’s face it; it can be really difficult to get along with other people, even if you like each other. Getting along with people at school or work that you are indifferent to or don’t like can truly be a struggle. The trouble is that no matter where you go, getting along with your peers is necessary for success. As an introvert, I really have a hard time connecting with people who don’t share my interests or that I don’t see very often, but I have found that being friendly with the people you work this is the key to having a good experience no matter what your job is. Here are a few handy tips to get along better with the people that you see every day, but don’t actually like.
A good starting place is being confident. The most important part of getting along with other people is being comfortable in your own opinions, but not aggressive about them. Don’t change for the people around you, but don’t make them feel like they have to change either. And I have found that the concept of faking it until you make it works really well here. I make sure to always behave like I have confidence, and it has actually really helped me trust in myself and then get along better with others. It is always better in the long run to be authentic, rather than to just go with the flow in order to get along with someone you don’t even interact with on a very deep level.
Listening is incredibly important. Even if you aren’t incredibly interested in what the person is saying, listening goes a long way in terms of building a rapport with your coworkers or other students in your school. In my experience, you need to find interest in what the person is saying, and do your best to think about how they feel. Faking interest is easy to detect, but finding real interest is something that they will really appreciate. I personally agree with the general feeling that showing genuine compassion listening to your peers is the best way to get along with them. I have found personally that I always feel better in an environment where my coworkers feel like they can talk to me
The most important thing is to roll with the punches. Even if you do your best, sometimes there will be people that you just can’t get along with. In that case, remember that it isn’t your fault, and that politeness will still go a long way, if not with that particular person than the others who are around you.
Reference Lists
Getting at the Truth or Getting Along: Accuracy- Versus Impression-Motivated Heuristic and Systematic Processing. Chen, Serena; Shechter, David; Chaiken, Shelly Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 71(2), Aug 1996, 262-275
Helping Others Helps Oneself: Response Shift Effects in Peer Support. Schwartz Carolyn E; Sendor, Meir; Social Science & Medicine, Volume 48, June 1999, 1563-1575
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