(This article is for educational purposes and is partly based on personal opinions. This article is not a substitute for professional advice, but general guidance. We advise you to always listen to your intuition and always do what is right for you.)
Have you had trouble opening up your feelings with others? Perhaps you’ve tried it before, but you received negative feedback from others.
According to a staff writer from HealthyPlace, openness comprises of making your outer world as similar as possible to your inner one. When you’re jealous, delighted, worried, or sad, why not express it to others in a healthy way? That’s how we define congruence. That is to say, it allows you to express yourself honestly by allowing you to see what your expression, words, and sentiments represent. It takes considerable effort and honesty. (Another reminder of caution about being too open for revealing everything.) You offer up your innermost feelings and thoughts in the name of being open but you could be oblivious to others’ feelings about it. Opening yourself also entails a duty, and that is to be aware of others’ feelings about you and to accept their responses. This may imply withholding certain information from individuals for their sake out of respect for their feelings. In this article, we are going to talk about how to emotionally open up to others, so that you can feel at ease with them when it’s being done right.
1. Find a proper time to share your feelings with others.
Make sure that you are not in a situation when you are feeling either stressed out or under the weather. If it is, hold off on sharing anything at all until you’re feeling better. When you start opening up about what’s bugging you, there is a propensity that you will end up sounding unpleasant to others. This means that you need to take into account the timing. Opening up your feelings when you’re emotionally stable could leave everyone feeling comfortable about sharing feelings with one another in the future.
2. Do not exceedingly vent about what’s bothering you.
Expressing your feelings and complaining about what’s bothering you are different matters. Express your feelings in moderation give others a chance to offer you their support. When they don’t feel forced into providing sympathy, both of you are more open to sharing your emotions in the future.
3. Understand the characteristic of the person before opening up to them emotionally.
If you find a person who is compassionate and empathetic, it is safe for you to open up and share your feelings with them. Make sure that you don’t choose someone who isn’t open to listening and understanding you. If you know someone for a long time and they have never been able to be your listener, then it is probably not the best idea to share your feelings with them. Their words can sometimes come across as critical when attempting to give their perspective on things that bother you.
4. Make your questions into assertions.
You may often have something you are afraid to express because you are concerned about being vulnerable. Hence, you tend to ask questions. You might, for example, ask, “Do you love me?” instead of “I’m in love with you.”, or ask “Do you like me?” when you could say, “I adore you,” instead. The idea to open up emotionally to others is to make your questions into statements.
5. Expressing your emotions in the first person.
Instead of using the second person, such as “you”, convert into “I” as the first person when communicating with someone. This reference can facilitate you going straight to the point with the person you emotionally open up with. For instance, you may say “I want to be with you.” rather than asking “What am I to you?”. Being emotionally unequivocal to someone could sometimes decrease the odds of being misunderstood and strengthen the emotional bond of one another when used in moderation, but remember not to abuse it.
6. Be a good listener to others.
Sometimes, it’s much easier to open up with someone emotionally after you’ve listened to their feelings. Relationships that have mutual understandings and compassion is considered healthy and long-lasting. People tend to listen to your feelings when you listened to theirs as if it’s a natural reciprocal action; thus, it achieves an equilibrium of emotional support between you and others.
7. Seek for therapy.
It is a therapist’s responsibility to identify the goal of the therapy to assist you in recognizing and opening up your emotions. Sometimes, your therapist can be your best confidant when there’s no ideal someone you can confide in. Knowing yourself makes it comfortable for someone you trust — your therapist– to learn more about you since it’s in a confine they are familiar with.
Understanding yourself first is the core to be able to open up emotionally. Putting your feelings into words will help you better understand them as well as the person receiving your emotional outpouring. Being able to express your feelings can help others to understand you more as time goes by.
Struggling to express your feelings? You can read this article and try these tips for opening up emotionally. Take care!
- Staff, H. (2009, January 1). How to Open Up and Reveal Yourself to Others. HealthyPlace. https://www.healthyplace.com/relationships/healthy-relationships/how-to-open-up-and-reveal-yourself-to-others
- Wolff, C. (2017, May 31). 11 Ways To Get Your Partner to Open Up. Bustle. https://www.bustle.com/p/11-ways-to-get-your-partner-to-open-up-if-you-think-they-rarely-share-their-true-feelings-61197