How Your Lack of Self-Love Affects Your Relationships

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According to Psychology Today, “Self-love is an umbrella term for different acts of love we perform toward ourselves physically and non-physically.” Self-love includes putting yourself first, being kind to yourself, trusting yourself, forgiving yourself for past mistakes, etc. So how can your lack of self-love affect your relationship? Let’s take a look!

Disclaimer- This article is for educational purposes and is based on personal opinions. This article is not a substitute for professional advice, but for general guidance. We advise you to always listen to your intuition and always do what is right for you. If you can relate to any of these signs, please do not take this feedback as an attack on your character. This article is meant to be a self-improvement guide for those of you who have been feeling a little stuck.

Not being able to accept the love you deserve.

 A healthy relationship involves the confidence to communicate assertively—courage that comes from self-acceptance, which allows you to value and honor your feelings and desires while also risking criticism or rejection by doing so. This also implies that you believe you are deserving of love and are at ease receiving it. You wouldn’t waste your time pursuing someone who isn’t available or rejecting someone who loves you and is able to meet your requirements.

Not prioritizing yourself. 

People who experience a lack of self-love may find it tough to seek support. You may be concerned about inconveniencing or “burdening” others. For example, you may cook all your meals even when you are sick instead of asking a friend to help out, you may hire painters to paint your walls before asking a friend for assistance. This indicates that people with love and self-love may not be able to get their needs met in their relationships because they are frightened to ask.

Trying to be someone who you are not.

In a relationship, a lack of self-love might make it tough to be your true self. You might put a lot of effort into how you look and how someone else perceives you.  For example, you might put in a lot of effort to entertain others by hosting parties, and making dinner plans with all of your partner’s friends, Or maybe you’re someone who is always trying to appear their best with expensive accessories and glamourous outfits.

Perpetually worried about your position in the relationship.

In a relationship, low self-esteem and a lack of self-love can lead to jealousy and insecurity. You may doubt your worth in the relationship and assume it is a coincidence that they like you. People who lack self-love often worry that their partner will be attracted to someone else or that they will leave the relationship at any moment.

Settling for whatever comes your way.

People with a lack of self-love are usually ready to make a commitment to the first person who shows any interest in them. They lose a lot of their thoughts and opinions when it comes to who they choose to be in a relationship with. Even though deep down, they are aware that they are unhappy. They may be prepared to put up with behaviors that they thought they would never entertain because they consider themselves fortunate to have anyone at all.

References:

Suzanne Lachmann (December 17, 2013). 10 Ways Low Self-Esteem Affects Women in Relationships. Retrieved June 02, 2022, from;

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/me-we/201312/10-ways-low-self-esteem-affects-women-in-relationships

Darlene Lancer (May 8, 2021). Your Self-Esteem Might Be Ruining Your Relationship. Retrieved June 02, 2022, from;

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/202105/your-self-esteem-might-be-ruining-your-relationship

Natalie Incledon (April 11, 2018). How Low Self-Esteem Affects Relationships. Retrieved June 02, 2022, from;

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