• Stuck in the Cynicism of Love (Open list) (0 submissions)

    Dear Faithful Readers,
    Is it truly possible to lose your faith in love? Yes. We’re living in the time where random hookups, casual sex, multiple partners, and non-commitments are more fun ways of dating. Very few people of younger generations have the intention of falling in love, committing to a person, feeling intimacy, and having emotional connection to pair alongside the physical. Every now and then, you’d see a couple's post on social media announcing their engagement after years of being together and I'd feel a spark. It’s a spark of hope, a tinge of warmth, a general bittersweet-ness. They have gotten their act together. They’re not going to be people looking for a one-night stands in their seventies. They won’t have find a new partner after a short time with the previous one.
    This outlook may lead you to think I’m cynical to love. You wouldn’t be completely wrong, but can you blame me, really? There is, however, a list of books I’ve read that have changed my views. The characters in these stories experience love in ways that actually make me believe in love again (albeit temporarily).
    1) The Fault In Our Stars by John Green
    2) Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell
    3) The Strange & Beautiful Sorrows of Ava Lavender by Leslye Walton
    4) Aaren by T. A Ford
    5) All the Bright Paces by Jennifer Niven
    6) Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Patterson
    With The Fault In Our Stars, Eleanor & Park, and All The Bright Places, the couples had their fair share of struggles before they met each other, and in some ways those things tried to create distance and tension for the couples. Sometimes they did, but they were willing to fight it, because they loved each other that much.
    For The Strange & Beautiful Sorrows of Ava Lavender, three generations of women who explored had dealt with battles in the name of love, but still found clarity and resolution from their pain. Their struggles, combined with magical realism, the story brings together wonder as well as connection.
    In Aaren, we have the classic trope of second-chance love. The couple knew each other for years, got together, broke up, and years later after establishing adult lives, they find themselves reunited. Sometimes, it’s easy to think once something has ended so horribly, there wouldn’t be a chance to make things right. Sometimes life gives us that chance for a reason.
    As for Bridge to Terabithia, the main characters (Jess and Leslie) aren’t a couple, but they have an incredible platonic love for each other. They started out strangers but formed a friendship and formed a place to escape the grittiness of reality. Their bond was so strong that when tragedy hit, it pulled at heartstrings and left readers crying for years.
    Am I saying that everyone has to lead their love lives a certain way to be happy? No. I am saying that people now seem afraid to take that plunge: to actually care about the person they’re intimate with, they choose random sex because of previous bad experience or to not feel tied down or because that’s their definition of fun. I am saying that the examples I’ve talked about dealt with relationships in ways that felt authentic and more meaningful in comparison to the hook-up culture that has tainted younger generations into taking the easy way out in terms of interacting with people.  The people and relationships in these stories aren't perfect in any way, but that's why they make good stories. It's reflective of the imperfections of people, but they are still willing to fight for something real. That’s my view anyway.
    Your Romantic Cynic


    10 Signs You’re an Introverted Extrovert

    Not everything in this world is in black and white. When asked if you’re more introverted or more extroverted in nature, it seems like a simple thing to answer. This is far from the truth. Like most things, the debate over introversion vs. extroversion lies on a spectrum. The lines constantly blur, and they are ever-changing.

    1. Selectively Social

    Breaking the ice shy awkward moments

    You want to be around people, but you don’t know how to go about it without being awkward.

    2.  Where's the Invite?

    Diverse People Hang Out Pub Friendship

    You want to be invited to hang out with friends but have the option to stay home. You don’t like not being invited to stuff and being left out of the loop when the friends are sharing stories the next day. It’s highly disrespectful and frustrating.

    3. Feeling Left Out

    concerned young woman in coffee shop

    You may not like to socialize all the time, but you still want to know what’s going on in your friends’ lives.

    4. Time to Go

    Concept of passing away, the clock breaks down into pieces

    Social events can be fun…within a certain time frame. If you get tired from a social engagement, you would like to be able to leave as soon as possible. This is harder if you don’t have a car of your own or another ride.

    5. Hear Me Roar

    screaming black woman

    You get talked over in conversation when you actually do want to speak. Whenever there is a pause and you say what you have to say, no one responds to it the way you had hoped and start talking about something else. It’s a vicious cycle.

    6. Event Misery

    Sad women and happy couple in the background

    You tend to be more sympathetic toward people who aren’t having that great a time at a gathering, even if you are, so you understand that for whatever reason, the person would rather be somewhere. Therefore, you respect their space, but you know how it feels.

    7. Did I Raise My Hand? Didn't Think So.

    Listener raising hand to ask

    You hate it when people call on you to participate in things when you don't want to. Most of the time, you enjoy sitting back and let other people contribute. When you feel comfortable enough to participate, you will, and there are actually times when you do volunteer. It’s just not often.

    8. Can I Say Something Funny? No? Ok.

    Expression and gesture concept - Handsome man with awkward face

    When you want to say something funny, but you don’t know how everyone else will take it, so you spend too much time internally debating whether or not you should say it to the point where the conversation had already moved on.

    9. I Mean No Harm

    Mixed race man confused shrug shoulders in studio

    You want to speak your mind, but you don't want the conversation to turn confrontational.

    10. Not About the Drama

    Concept accusation guilty business woman fingers pointing

    Never call out an introvert in an argument. Introverts would find it much more respectful if a person pulled them aside and talked to them privately instead of in a crowded room (or an equivalent).



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