Mental Illness Recovery Series: Short Story # 43

This is the 43rd story of the Mental Illness Recovery Series. Anonymous still suffers from her mental illnesses, but she has learned to control it through different coping techniques. This is her story:

Anonymous loves music, especially punk-rock. She is fond of writing and composing music. Anonymous is learning to play guitar and piano, and is in choir at her school. She enjoys art and doodling a lot. Academics are also important to her. She loves science and is on the math team. Within five years she hopes to be in college studying physics. Anonymous suffers from depression, anxiety and EDNOS (caused by her emetophobia). She believes her depression could have been triggered by feeling left out.

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She has been seeing a therapist every so often after she started self-harming in 2014, but when things got bad she became suicidal, and ended up going to an intensive outpatient program at a hospital. Anonymous had to deal with terrible symptoms, she said, “I was extremely tired and depressed, and I didn’t want to get out of bed. I was really fatigued and always short of breath. During anxiety attacks or uneasiness I would feel flushed, shaky, and nauseous.”

This affected her relationships with others because she didn’t want to be around people. Anonymous said, “Everyone got on my nerves, and I constantly fought with people- more specifically my mom and my boyfriend.” This made her feel trapped and abnormal. She said, “I remember constantly thinking, I don’t want to deal with this anymore.” The turning point for her was when she started intensive therapy and taking medication. It made her feel like she was actually getting her disorders under control. Anonymous learned different things to control her anxiety, she learned coping skills, to focus on the present moment by controlling her breathing. To cope with her depression she became active and busy. To control her eating disorder she’d remind herself to eat healthy.

Anonymous surrounded herself with helpful people, she said, “I had other people to give me the push I needed when I wanted to give up. My boyfriend helped me hang in there when the depression got rough and I wanted to kill myself, and my parents helped me overcome anxiety/EDNOS by helping me deal with my eating problems. My boyfriend also tells me he thinks I’m beautiful no matter what, so I’m not afraid of gaining weight.” She has learned that she is in control of her emotions. This experience has changed her, she is now more herself and she has a better outlook of the future. To prevent this from happening again, she is attempting to change her lifestyle and simple patterns that could be triggering her.

This is her advice for others struggling through similar situations:

“To anyone with emetophobia – you won’t throw up if you eat food. Food is supposed to be in your body. Your body throws up to get rid of a harmful substance. You won’t throw up by eating a healthy amount.

To anyone, remember you’re in control of your emotions and your life and you’ll feel better someday.”

Anonymous is a strong young lady and has been able to gain back control of her life. I am sure she will overcome it one day. Help me make a difference by sharing your story.

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