5 Ways to Let Someone Down Easily

Regardless of who does the dumping or the reasons why the relationship is ending, breakups are never easy. Thus, it is crucial to make the event go smoothly. Not just for your sake, but for the other person as well. 

Here are a few tips to help you making letting go of a relationship much easier. 

• Do it as soon as you know.

This step is can be hard to recognize. Sometimes, you can get caught up in the motions of being in a relationship that you might not realize when it longer works. But, whether you immediately know or realize a bit later, tell that person. Tell them as soon as you know you are not interested. It is a sign that you respect your time and theirs. Dragging on a breakup is cruel. 

• Do it in person.

We so often are accustomed to talking via text or email. Texting is fast and simple. It creates efficiency, and perhaps that is what you may want when you break up with someone– to get it over with as soon as possible. But, don’t do it over text. If you are going to break up with someone, especially if you have been on more than one date, do it in person. But, only do so if the relationship is not a toxic one. 

Breaking up with someone over text makes you seem cold and uncaring. It removes any form of accountability from the process. Not only is it hurtful, but it also can make the healing process difficult for both of you. It will give you both closure. 

• Be honest and direct.

When breaking up with someone, try not to sound condescending for the sake of protecting their feelings. So, please avoid vague euphemisms such as “taking a break.” Discuss things truthfully while also being empathetic. You are both, presumably, mature people. Explain why you no longer want to be in a relationship without hurting the other person’s feelings. Circumventing around the issue can lead to further confusion and false hope. Also, but do not sugar coat things at the end by saying that they will find someone better. Though well-intentioned, cliches sometimes add insult to injury. 

• Do not dredge up past baggage.

Even if your partner was not a saint, none of us are, do not assign blame. Also, avoid harping on the negative aspects of the relationship. A breakup is not the right time to attack that person’s character. It’s an already painful experience. Do not make it worse. Instead, focus on what you prioritize or value in a relationship. Doing so allows you both to process what is happening and avoid messy endings. 

• Do not overwhelm them. 

Part of a breakup also includes what happens after. Though lingering feelings may compel you to check in on them, resist the urge. Do not “haunt” or stalk their social media accounts. Above all, do not hook up with them. It’s cruel. The only time you should attempt to reconcile a relationship is if you accept them for who they are and you honestly want to try again. There is no point otherwise. Backsliding creates too much confusion and makes it much harder for either of you to let go. Give the other person space to process the breakup and be open if they have questions. 

Things do not always end neatly. Sometimes it can be messy and unpredictable, especially in relationships. However, if you are ending things with someone, try to be direct and honest while giving them space to process things and ask questions. 

Good luck and take care!

Sources: 

Emery, Lea Rose. 7 Tips For Letting Someone Down Gently, According To Experts. 7 Nov. 2018, www.bustle.com/p/7-tips-for-letting-someone-down-gently-according-to-experts-13103525. 

Harvey, Steve. “How To Let Him Down Easy.” HuffPost, HuffPost, 7 Dec. 2017, www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-let-him-down-easy_b_7936084. 

Macnaghten, Holly. “DATING: 5 Ways to Let a Woman down Gently: The Gentleman’s Journal: The Latest in Style and Grooming, Food and Drink, Business, Lifestyle, Culture, Sports, Restaurants, Nightlife, Travel and Power.” The Gentleman’s Journal, 30 Oct. 2017, www.thegentlemansjournal.com/5-ways-let-woman-gently/. 

Shatto, Rachel. “10 Nice Reject Texts To Send After A Bad Date To Let Someone Down Easy.” Elite Daily, Elite Daily, 5 Dec. 2017, www.elitedaily.com/p/10-texts-to-send-after-a-date-if-you-need-to-let-them-down-easy-6789625.