9 Psychological Ways To Encourage Your Crush To Like You Back.

This article is for educational purposes only. These ways described in the article are not to be confused with physical or emotional manipulation. Forcing somebody to like you back and overstepping peoples boundaries is never acceptable. The methods in this article is supported by psychological evidence and guidance from experts. If you feel concerned about your own behaviour or that of somebody else, always speak to somebody else you trust. 

Isn’t it frustrating when you like somebody and really want them to reciprocate those feelings back? Perhaps they do and we have no idea how they feel. Sometimes, we may feel like we want to take things into our own hands and work our magic to see if we can create ways to encourage people to like us back.

Here at Psych2Go, we have looked through some articles for psychological research on the science of attraction to find strategies and tips which you can use to encourage people to like you.

Here are some ways to encourage your crush to like you back.

1. Laugh at their jokes.

Yakov Smirnoff once said ” If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.” If you are able to laugh in each others presence and exchange jokes and funny stories, they will feel like you are at ease with them and will be more likely to open up more to you. Licensed psychologist and the host of ‘Marriage Steps’ podcast, Dr Wyatt Fisher (PsyD) states ” The more we laugh with someone, the more we are drawn to them” (Taylor Andrews, 2020).

2. Spend lots of time with them.

According to the “mere-exposure effect,” people tend to like things which they consider are familiar to them. According to Roantree, this effect refers to the fact that “simply being around someone often and long enough will increase their liking of you”. Knowledge of this phenomenon dates back to the 1950s, when MIT researchers discovered that college students who lived closer together in housing projects were more likely to be friends than students who lived farther apart. So there is no reason why this couldn’t work with the person you have a crush on!

3. Prolonged Eye contact

Ever catch your crush clocking you when you are looking at them? Try and hold that contact for as long as possible (before it starts to become uncomfortable!) Studies have found that prolonged eye contact increases the likelihood that two people will fall in love.

In his groundbreaking research on this subject, Social psychologist Arthur Aron says, “the two biggest factors to falling in love through eye contact are i) the other person is reasonably appropriate and desirable, and ii) there is reason to think they might be interested in you.”(How To Get A Guy To Like You Using Psychology-Based “Mind Tricks,” 2020) Furthermore, studies have found if you look at someone you fancy 75% of the time when they’re talking to you, you trick their brain. The brain knows the last time someone looked at them that long and often, it meant they were in love. MiS. (2017).

4. Wear the same colours they do.

Obviously don’t go changing your wardrobe just to match them, but maybe find a way of incorporating some of the same colours they like or what they wear into an outfit of your own. Sex therapist Cheryl Cyr suggests that doing by doing this, your crush will notice that you’re wearing the colours that they are attracted to and may even compliment you!

5. Mirror or mimic what they are doing. 

This one may sound a bit strange, however, it makes sense when you understand the subtle psychology behind it.

In 1999, New York University researchers documented the “chameleon effect,” which occurs when people unconsciously mimic each other’s behaviour. Researchers had 78 men and women work on a task with a partner, who was really a confederate working for the researchers. The partners engaged in different levels of mimicry, while researchers secretly videotaped the interactions. At the end of the interaction, the researchers had participants indicate how much they liked those partners. The research found that participants were more likely to say that they liked their partner when their partner had mimicked their behaviour.

The findings from this research is supported by licensed sex therapist, Cheryl, Cyr, who stated “When you mimic someone’s behaviour, they think more favourably of you. It creates a connection. You see someone smile, you smile. They rub their face, you rub your face. They move their hair, you move your hair.” Further research has shown that we are more likely to feel comfortable in someone’s company who mirror our body language as it is a form of bonding. Overall, this can make you seem attractive to the other person. Just make sure to keep it subtle!

6. Watch a scary movie with them.

Great news for all you horror fans out there! Even if you don’t like scary films, it gives you the perfect excuse to experience adrenaline together with your crush. Relationship expert Adina Mahalli at Maple Holistic stated, “Putting your crush in fear-enhancing situations has the potential to make them like you because they attribute their adrenaline rush and increased heart rate to you, rather than the situation.” Who knew that adrenaline could equal attraction? Anybody fancy watching “The Exorcist?”

7. Casually touch them.

In a University of Mississippi and Rhodes College experiment, they studied the effects of interpersonal touch on restaurant tipping. Waitresses briefly touched customers on the hand or shoulder as they were returning their change. What the research found was, they earned significantly larger tips than waitresses who didn’t touch their customers. This is known as “subliminal touching,” which occurs when you touch a person so subtly that they barely notice. Common examples include tapping someone’s back or touching their arm, which can make them feel more warmly toward you. (This goes without saying, but make sure you respect and don’t overstep peoples boundaries, as some people are not always comfortable with touching).

8. Ask them for favors.

Studies have shown that people tend to like people who they do favours for, even if they initially hated them. This reverse psychology phenomenon is known as the Ben Franklin Effect, since the Founding Father himself was the one who discovered this strange trick. As he wrote in his autobiography: “He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged.” This is because we subconsciously make ourselves believe that the person would do the same for us as we did for them.

9. Use their name.

Now, this might seem like an obvious one! Of course you would refer to somebody using their name, however, it is supported by research that hearing your name being said by someone, is an ego boost! Studies have shown that hearing your own name has a unique effect on brain activation, as our brains involuntarily respond to the sound of our own names, even in a state in which we are unable to respond to or act on anything else. (How To Get A Guy To Like You Using Psychology-Based “Mind Tricks,” 2020). So anytime you are around your crush, try and make sure you address them by their name and see what happens!

Thank you for taking the timer to read this article. I hope you have found it an interesting and useful read! Remember that just because these methods are supported by psychological research and evidence, does not mean that they will work on every person. It is important to remember to be yourself and not put others into situations where they feel under pressure by you. If things are supposed to happen they will happen naturally, even if these tips help to give you a bit of a nudge! If you have any comments, then please leave a comment in the box below, as we love to hear back from our readers 🙂 

Watch this space for my next article! 

J:) 

References‌

7 Psychological Tricks To Make Anyone Fall In Love With You. Made in Shoreditch Magazine. https://madeinshoreditch.co.uk/2017/08/18/7-psychological-tricks-make-anyone-fall-love/

17 psychological tricks to make people like you immediately. (2019). Ladders | Business News & Career Advice. Retrieved November 24, 2020, from https://www.theladders.com/career-advice/17-psychological-tricks-to-make-people-like-you-immediately

How To Get A Guy To Like You Using Psychology-Based “Mind Tricks.” (2020). YourTango. https://www.yourtango.com/2017301623/11-psychological-tricks-help-get-guy-like-yo

Taylor Andrews. (2020, January 20). 12 Genius and Sneaky Ways to Get Your Crush to Fall For You, According to Experts. Cosmopolitan. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a30538685/how-to-get-your-crush-to-like-you/

‌Twersky, C., & Bennett, W. (2019, February 27). How To *Actually* Get Your Crush To Like You Back. Seventeen. https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/a25363090/how-to-get-your-crush-to-like-you/