A Post-College Survival Guide: An Interview with Deborah Cohan, Ph.D.
By Nikki Moylan
As colleges end and graduations go on, a lot of young millennials are thrown into the real world and experience stress.
I talked to Deborah Cohan, Ph.D. about how to survive after college. Cohan is a college professor, interdisciplinary sociologist, a feminist sociologist, and a public sociologist. She also is a published author and writes a blog, which can be found here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/social-lights
What advice do you have for those about to graduate college?
Cohan says, “I would urge them to cultivate the following qualities:
1) Curiosity. One of the greatest gifts one can give oneself is to become a lifelong learner. Lifelong learning is a recognized marker of successful aging. I would also like to see students take classes, workshops and seminars in things they fear they might fail but have an interest in. I wish I had done this.
2) Critical Thinking. A central goal of the classroom and beyond should be to strip away taken for granted assumptions and develop a critical lens for looking at social problems and issues. Developing fresh eyes and cultivating a sense of beginner’s mind, over and over again, are crucial. Graduates need to keep asking “how” and “why.”
3) Contemplation. Henry David Thoreau was onto something when he said, “Dwell as near as possible to the channel in which your life flows.” A main purpose of college is to cultivate the life of the mind. One of my greatest hopes for graduates is that they can pause, be still, relish in solitude, deep thinking and inquiry, and reflect in a mindful, meaningful way. In this day and age of frenzied multitasking and fragmented communication mediated by technology, cultivating the contemplative, soulful mind goes a long way.
4) Compassion. Contemplation leads to compassion. Through this, students build empathy for the world beyond themselves.
5) Communication. Students who can communicate effectively, both face to face and in writing, surpass their peers in so many ways and certainly in seeking employment after graduation. I am forever stunned by the number of students and graduates who do not write proper emails and letters—and perhaps most importantly do not know how to position themselves as thoughtful communicators with reliable follow through. A simple example of this is expressing gratitude and sending a thank you note after an interview, with detailed examples of what was meaningful and memorable.”
How do you assess your students when they are in need of help?
Who should students talk to when they are afraid to admit if they don’t know what they want to do during or even after college?
What do you recommend students should do if they’re unsure of their major and the cost of college is too high for them?
It seems like Ms Cohan is a great teacher. I wish more of my college teachers had had the interest or the time to talk to us more and follow up with us. Maybe that is a problem that our (Germany’s) education system has.
I think the advice she gives is very useful, eventhough in a society that sometimes values hard skills over soft skills, it seems hard to follow at first.
Alice—see reply above! 😉
Alice—-Wow, I so appreciate this! Thank you. It means a lot. Best wishes, Deb
This article was very useful even for a graduating senior! I’ve found that not many of my fellow peers has been open to following these tips. They’re more focused on the trivial things in life rather than developing their minds for college. I particularly find curiosity and contemplation the ones that stand out to me the most in that list. To me, curiosity leads to exploring life and what it has to offer while contemplation refers to reflecting on that curiosity. They go very well together!
Do you offer any tips on getting this message out there?
Natalie—I am so grateful that you wrote this! It’s helpful to know what resonates most. I agree that curiosity and contemplation are the biggies!! As for tips in getting the message out—-please, please share this article as much as you can! And, check out my blog with lots of other related articles! https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/social-lights
You can also find me at Deborah Cohan Writing on Facebook! 😉 Be well! ~Deb
As I was going through articles, this one grabbed my attention. I didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as I did; I expected a very cliche article. But, I really really enjoyed this article. I enjoyed what Dr. Cohen’s top 5 word of advices were. As I read them I couldn’t help but feel “wow I totally agree.” I thought the questions that were asked were vital, and touched the foundation of what I could realistically achieve post- college. It didn’t leave me like “um okay this wasn’t helpful at all.” I genuinely agreed with this, and the questions asked were questions i genuinely have as I come closer and closer to graduation. Dr. Cohen’s advice essentially were ways to become a better person and to reach success and I really did love reading this article.
As a recent graduate, this article is a really good read! I wished professors spent more time in class spent on talking about life after college and built relationships with their students. Not only that, but it also made me reflect on how much time I didn’t spend on taking more risks, travel the world, or explore my possibilities, but instead followed the same pattern throughout my career as a student of racing to learn and get high marks on tests, but end up with an empty feeling when reaching the finish line.
The advice that Dr. Cohan gives is helpful, especially for graduating seniors, and for graduates who are feeling adrift with no direction that is often felt after graduation, gives a lot of hope on the path of the unknown future.
As a rising senior in college, I am always stumped with the question of “what are you doing after you graduate?” Despite meeting so many new people and experiencing so many new things during this time, I also believe it is a time when it is possible to feel extremely lonely. It is hard to know one’s path and I was pulled by this article since the title says “a post-college survival guide.” Living in a world filled with technology, the nice thing is, even when you feel alone, there are ways to cope and find solutions simply by searching online and reading articles such as this one. It makes you realize you are not the only one with certain issues and are definitely not alone in this confusing and difficult time in your life.
The part of the article where Dr. Cohen discusses about being an undecided major really resonated with me. For the first two years of my college experience, I was undecided. It made me feel behind, but when I look back, I do not regret it at all. I took a wide variety of classes such as Human Evolution, Computer Science, Sociology, Korean, Astronomy, Criminology, Business, and various other courses to explore my passions. These also fulfilled my school’s core requirements so it did not feel like I was wasting my time taking them either. I was able to try out so many different subjects and see which ones are a fit for me. I not only discovered my passions, but also other interests such as with Astronomy and being up to date with articles about space and discoveries. I made friends in these classes that share similar interests and was able to find people to talk to about my problems. They were not necessarily mentors such as Dr. Cohen suggested, but I definitely have found people that can help me with my problems without prejudice and judgment. College is a very new and confusing experience, and graduating college and entering the real world is even scarier, but articles like this can definitely help someone take a deep breath and realize they are not the only one and we are all confused and inexperienced people in this vast new environment, and that is okay.
Thanks for sharing your own experiences and glad you resonated with it. It’s nice to hear that you feel such an article can be of use to others who might be in the same place. Would you say college/friends and taking on more subjects helped you determine what you want to do?
I definitely think they helped me determine what I want to do. I was never pressured to do a certain thing by my family so I was very open to explore. The only regrets a person can have are the chances they don’t take, not the chances they do take, so I am happy with my accomplishments in college. I allowed myself to explore many things and with the help of friends, I realized that it was not wrong. Different people have different paths and comparing yourself to others will only bring you down. As long as you believe in what you’re doing, go for it!
Great Article,
As a millennial and late 2000’s graduate, I’ve absolutely asked myself these questions multiple times. This is a discussion that should be had on a very high scale. The amount of graduates and students who feel a sense of hopelessness in life because of the pressure of education seems to be at an all time high. Though i do believe college is a privilege, it is a very easy opportunity to waste years of your life, if you do not have guidance on a career path or interest in a study. I do advise upcoming graduates to write down, current hobbies, interest and begin to map what your goals (realistic goals) are after school. I also recommend a book by two stanford professors called “Design your Life”; they currently teach a course (which should be offered everywhere!) on how literally design your life.
Good luck grads, the world is yours!