6 Reasons That People Leave The Ones They Love

This article is for educational purposes and is not to suggest that you should end a relationship if you feel these things are happening in your own relationship. Sitting down with your partner to discuss this, is important or speaking to somebody you trust to support you. 

Being in love can feel like the most amazing thing in the world. Even though you might think that you and your partner are so in love with one another doesn’t necessarily mean that your relationship is okay. Sometimes, you can be in a relationship with someone who loves you and that person could still leave you. That feeling of abandonment can really hurt and it hurts because you know that you have love within your grasp and still you let it slip away.

It can make you question the entire relationship; would someone who loves you still find a way to abandon you? Why would a person so willingly walk away from love? Well, the truth is that relationships are just inherently difficult. Love alone isn’t going to be enough to make a relationship work and it can be painful for both parties.

Here are 6 reasons as to why people choose to leave the ones that they love:

They don’t feel respected.

At the foundation of any kind of relationship is that there should always be respect. People can love each other but they would never allow themselves to stay with each other if they weren’t being shown mutual respect. A person’s dignity is always going to come first and you need to stay mindful of that fact.

They don’t feel supported emotionally. 

A bulk of what makes up a relationship is emotional support between two individuals who love one another. Neither one of them wants to feel slighted or cheated. Going through rough patches is not uncommon and being vulnerable can be difficult for anybody. This is usually because vulnerability means the opportunity for pain and if one partner doesn’t feel they are being  supported emotionally, it’s less likely that they will allow themselves to be vulnerable with the other partner. 

They experience a loss of physical intimacy.

Physical affection is more than sex and is what holds a relationship together. Research has found that non-sexual intimacy is key to long-term happiness in a relationship and anything skin-to-skin releases the same bonding chemicals in your brain as sex. Research has found that humans have an innate ability to interpret emotional messages via touch alone. In a 2009 study conducted by Hertenstein et al., blindfolded people were able to correctly interpret eight distinct emotions (anger, fear disgust, love, gratitude, sympathy, happiness, sadness), solely through the touch of a stranger with 78% accuracy. Loss of physical intimacy is often the first step towards a loss of emotional intimacy. It’s such a critical part of a relationship that when it’s gone, people may be tempted look for it somewhere else.

They don’t feel adequate.

Believe it or not, a person is always at risk of leaving whenever they don’t feel like they are enough for somebody. If somebody loves their partner, then they will want to feel validated by their partner and feel appreciated. If they don’t feel this, eventually they may feel inadequate and choose to leave the relationship.

They don’t feel listened to.

We are all told that communication is very important in a relationship. However, a lot of us also take that to mean that we need to be doing a lot of talking in the relationship. In a relationship, more than just talking; it’s also about listening. Remember that communication is comprised of both listening and talking. People who don’t feel listened to by their partner more frequently may feel that they cannot express themselves in the way they would like to.

They no longer feel an emotional connection.

Studies have shown that the love and passion that comes with the initial boost of marriage, had a tendency to wear off after two years, which is why the best relationships are the ones that have genuine friendship at their core. Emotional connection is often what sustains a long-lasting relationship and if this is no longer there, this may be another reason why people chose too leave the person they love.

We hope that you have found this interesting and useful. If you have any feedback or want to share any thoughts and feelings, please leave a comment in the box below. It can be a difficult and overwhelming situation to be in especially making the decision to leave a relationship that you are invested in. Make sure you have somebody to open up to who you trust. 

J 🙂

References 

3 Reasons Why People Leave the Person They Love. (2018, December 12). The Powerful Mind. http://powerfulmind.co/why-people-leave-love/

4 Reasons Why People Leave The Ones They Love. (2018, December 22). Relationship Rules. https://www.relrules.com/4-reasons-why-people-leave-the-ones-they-love/

Hertenstein, M. J., Holmes, R., McCullough, M., & Keltner, D. (2009). The communication of emotion via touch. Emotion, 9(4), 566–573. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0016108

Relationships: The 6 Reasons People Leave (And How to Avoid It Happening To Yours). (2015, February 9). Hey Sigmund. https://www.heysigmund.com/6-reasons-people-leave-relationships-and-how-to-avoid-it-happening-to-yours/