Has someone ever done something that made you question their maturity?
Immaturity can come in many forms. Most children tend to outgrow their immaturity and curb their impulses as they grow older. However, a good number of people carry childlike traits along with them into adulthood without even realizing it.
Here are six signs that someone may be immature.
Disclaimer: If you can relate to any of these signs, please do not take this feedback as an attack on your character. This article was meant to be a self-improvement guide for those of you who have been feeling a little stuck.
They can’t handle pressure gracefully
Oftentimes, an immature person can work fine with others under normal conditions. But when a major problem arises, an immature person may crack under pressure and start looking outwards for someone else to blame. In a team setting, they could be seen as arrogant, conceited, and difficult to work with. If they were the cause of the problem, they may end up defensive and avoid the responsibility in order to save face instead of owning up to their mistakes and finding a proper solution.
They don’t leave their comfort zones
Do you know anyone who doesn’t challenge themselves at all?
An immature person doesn’t like the idea of having responsibilities being forced on them. They prefer sticking with the familiar. According to research done at Walden University, the comfort zone isn’t all that bad of a place to be. It can help you rest after you’ve pushed out of your boundaries. But staying there longer than needed prevents you from learning new skills, acquiring new experiences, and makes you feel complacent.
An immature person vehemently pushes against the idea of venturing past the comfort zone — confining their perspectives and keeping their comfort zone as thin as it always was.
They are avoidant
Have you ever been ghosted before? (*sigh*) Join the club.
An immature person finds difficult conversations taxing. They don’t have a good sense of the future and uncertainty, and if things turn for the worst, they may dash without a word. Immature people don’t just do this in relationships: their avoidance stems from their abhorrence towards responsibility in any form — from careers, investments, and owning up to mistakes.
They exhibit signs of narcissism
Do you know anyone who insults others when things don’t go their way? Or someone who feels heightened self-importance compared to everyone else?
These types of people are narcissists. They bend the truth to accommodate their whims and fantasies, regressing back to a childlike state at the slightest indication of things not going their way. People who have Narcissistic Personality Disorders developed their trauma during early childhood – causing them to remain stuck in the age of the past. While it’s possible for narcissists to curb their tendencies, there are striking overlaps between narcissists and immature people due to the regressive nature of the disorder.
They enjoy power-tripping over others
Have you ever had a boss that had a heightened sense of self?
Immature people can be very insecure people. They tend to have low self-esteem, and one way they can display that is by power-tripping over other people. They bully others and undermine the success of others to maintain their display of dominance — even if no one truly believes it. Behind their tough-guy facade, however, is a fragile ego that demands constant attention and approval through childlike mannerisms.
They see the world in black and white
Do you remember a time when you only see you’re friend as good or bad?
As you grow older, you’ll develop a construct of people that’s much more complex than complexes made during early childhood. In your younger years, you may hate how vegetables tasted and don’t see how eating it is rewarding at all. But as you grow older, your brain starts understanding things in a more multi-faceted light — like how that vegetable is gross but good for you.
In social relationships, an immature person may be overly sensitive to the thought of someone nitpicking one aspect of them. They may rationalize by thinking, “They must hate me.” or “I’m such a burden.”, fixating on their perceived flaws and not seeing the good in things. Once a person matures, they can recognize their weaknesses without afflicting themselves with hurtful comments.
Do you know anyone who exhibits the signs above? Do you find yourself relating to some of these situations and want to improve?
Anyone is capable of change if they set their mind to it. The journey is tough and arduous, and there will be ups and downs, but no person is the same as they were years ago. If childhood abuse and trauma are preventing you from finding the strength to take the first step, consider consulting a therapist to help you.
That’s all for now, Psych2Goers!
The Pros and Cons of Comfort Zones. Retrieved at https://www.waldenu.edu/programs/psychology-counseling/resource/the-pros-and-cons-of-comfort-zones
Brennan, D. Narcissism: Symptoms and Signs. Dec 2, 2020. Retrieved at https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/narcissism-symptoms-signs
Mor, N. (Jan 2017) 14 Signs Of Immature People Who Really Need To Just Grow Up. Retrieved at https://thoughtcatalog.com/nikita-mor/2017/01/14-signs-of-immature-people-who-really-need-to-just-grow-up/
NA. (Aug 3, 2020) 11 Signs of an Ego-Tripping & Power Hungry Leader. Retrieved at https://journeytoleadershipblog.com/2020/08/03/7-signs-of-an-ego-tripping-power-hungry-leader/
NA. ND. What Is Emotional Immaturity? Retrieved at https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-is-a-emotional-immaturity
Neuharth, D. (June 21, 2020) 13 Ways Narcissists Behave Like Children Retrieved at https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/narcissism-demystified/202006/13-ways-narcissists-behave-children