6 Signs Someone Grew Up With Depression

Do you know someone who struggles with depression? Or are you struggling yourself, and not sure how to differentiate your sadness from depression?

Here are signs of someone who grew up with depression.

Disclaimer: This is a disclaimer that this article is for informative purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose or treat any condition. Please reach out to a qualified healthcare provider or mental health professional if you are struggling.

1) Thinks they’re the blame for everything

Do they blame themselves for every relationship conflict?

It’s noble to hold yourself responsible for the wrongdoings that you’ve done in the past. But a misaligned virtuousness can be just as damaging as not facing the conflict at all.

According to a study by a group of psychologists led by Roland Zahn, self-blaming tendencies occur in over 80% of the patients they’ve screened. Similarly, 85% of people in the same test believe that these self-blaming emotions are the most bothersome to deal with.

While you may feel like you’re taking responsibility by self-blaming, you’re doing the exact opposite. You’re unconsciously stonewalling yourself by not being vulnerable to your shortcomings. Instead of blaming yourself, you may find growth in finding a professional to talk to about these problems if you still exhibit them to this day.

2) Have physical pains with no clear underlying cause

Does your friend complain about random aches and pains with no clear reason?

If yes, it may be a sign that they’re trying to signal you about their internal state. According to a doctor of psychology Juli Fraga, the connection between pains in the physical body and depression is more common in Asian cultures, as they’re likely to describe depression as pains in their physical body.

These types of symptoms manifest as a decreased pain tolerance, unbearable fatigue, headaches, and stomach uneasiness. If someone has these issues, in any case, it’s good to talk to a doctor about it and talk about your prescriptions.

3) Anger and tantrums

While not as common as shame and low self-worth, long-term anger can be an uncommon yet telltale sign of people suffering from depression. Depression is oftentimes referred to as “anger turned inwards” since it reflects an overly critical voice that makes it hard for you to move past diminished self-worth and shame.

Staying overly angry yourself forces your mind to think of the negatives. This not only worsens the severity of depression, but it can also manifest as outward manifestations of those emotions as well – causing a vicious cycle where you hurt the important people of your life when you need them the most.

4) They were an outcast

Do they have a hard time connecting with others and maintaining long-lasting relationships?

According to John Cacioppo, loneliness sounds the same alarm bells for when we feel thirst, hunger, and physical pain. He also stated that The American Association of Retired Persons(AARP) conducted a study on American participants and found that around 40 to 45% of the population feel lonely the past decade, an increase from 11-20% during the 1970s.

But, what causes it? And how does it cause depression? Loneliness is caused by many things, like heredity, our environment, circumstances, and our attitudes. Lacking social connections can lower your self-worth as well, amplifying your critical voice.

To help a lonely friend, send them a comforting text or give them a call – even if they don’t pick up the phone at first, it will be comforting for your friend to know you’re there for them.

5) Lack of motivation

Did they lack the motivation to get up from bed in the morning to go to school?

Lacking motivation can impede you from accomplishing your goals. The lack of motivation is not the main issue here, but rather an underlying problem that’s causing you to lack motivation in the first place. Are you stuck in a situation that you’d rather not be in? Do you feel that you can’t commit to one thing?

By pinpointing the main cause of your lack of motivation, you can come up with a plan of action to become better, whether it’s by improving yourself in small gradual steps or getting out of a bad situation.

6) They express hopelessness about their future

Do they feel like they have nothing to look forward to because they feel stuck in a rut?

This may be hopelessness depression. Lyn Abramson, a professor of psychology at the University of Wisconsin–Madison, posits the theory by saying that repeated exposure to perceived uncontrollable circumstances and negative stimuli leads to a sense of helplessness. This helplessness, in turn, can spiral into a negative worldview and depression.

A lot of this has to do with how our mind works. If your mind postulates that an argument with an acquaintance was due to your own shortcomings, causing them to never want to associate with you, therefore ruining your reputation, you’ll likely suffer from hopelessness. On the other hand, if you believe that their irritability is temporary and won’t lead to actual adverse effects, you won’t be affected as much.

Closing Thoughts

If you’re still struggling today, we hope that you can find a little bit of positivity in your life through the little things. Whether it’s your pet, a walk in the park, or the lovely people in the most unexpected places.

That’s all for now, Psych2Goers!

References

Zahn, R., Lythe, K. E., Gethin, J. A., Green, S., Deakin, J. F., Young, A. H., & Moll, J. (2015). The role of self-blame and worthlessness in the psychopathology of major depressive disorder. Journal of affective disorders, 186, 337–341. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2015.08.001

Jacobson, S. January 30, 2018. “It’s All My Fault” – When You Can’t Do Anything Right. Retrieved at https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/counselling/its-all-my-fault-self-blame.htm

Fraga, J. 7. August 15, 2019 Physical Symptoms That Prove Depression Is Not Just ‘In Your Head’ Retrieved at https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/physical-symptoms-of-depression

Cuncic, A. The Connection Between Depression and Anger. Retrieved at https://www.verywellmind.com/connection-between-depression-and-anger-5085725

Morin, A. February 16, 2021. What to Do When You Have No Motivation? Retrieved at https://www.verywellmind.com/what-to-do-when-you-have-no-motivation-4796954

Liu, R. T., Kleiman, E. M., Nestor, B. A., & Cheek, S. M. (2015). The Hopelessness Theory of Depression: A Quarter Century in Review. Clinical psychology : a publication of the Division of Clinical Psychology of the American Psychological Association, 22(4), 345–365. https://doi.org/10.1111/cpsp.12125