Dear guys (and girls, I’m not going to be exclusive here), sometimes you need to learn to take ‘no’ for an answer. Not everyone who is single wants to date, and – sorry, but someone has to say it- not everyone you meet is going to be interested in you. It’s most likely nothing personal. Even if it is, you should respect that rejection no matter how much it might hurt. If a girl isn’t interested, it’s not the end of the world.
Rejection can hurt even more when there’ve been mixed signals. Sometimes a girl’s behavior can be flirty without her even realizing it, or she may be in the market for a different type of relationship than you’re asking her for. If you’re confused, don’t worry; plenty of others are in the same boat. For all anyone knows, the girls who don’t want a relationship may be just as confused as you are.
Luckily, I can help provide some insight. I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum between wanting a boyfriend in the worst way and never wanting to see a man ever again. I’ve been rejected, and I’ve rejected others for a variety of reasons. Nine times out of ten, it’s nothing personal and the two of us have moved on and been just fine. Sometimes, though, there’s that one person that just can’t let it go. It’s not an easy thing to reject somebody, especially for the second or third time, but the hardest part about being pursued after an attempted rejection is the lack of respect that can develop between the two parties.
Oftentimes, respect comes out of understanding. Especially if there’s been mixed messages in the past, it can be tough to understand why a girl may not want a relationship. There could be a lot gong on in her life, or she may just prefer the life of a bachelorette. Here are seven reasons why some girls don’t want a relationship.
1. They’re Prioritizing Other Aspects Of Their Life
Relationships can be time consuming and energy draining. Some ladies need their time and energy to focus on something, like her career or a passion project. It’s nothing against you, it’s just that something else has that special place in her heart right now.
2. They Want Sexual Variety
Not everyone is into the idea of an open relationship, so most people consider sex outside of a monogamous relationship to be cheating. If a girl wants to keep some variety in her sex life, a boyfriend or girlfriend is most likely out of the question. Not to say that monogamy can’t be exciting, but some people just prefer something new every few nights.
3. They Are Busy
If she’s got a lot going on, the stress of a relationship can just be too much. Many girls learn this the hard way, and once they’ve learned they’re a lot more selective about relationships. This doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of being her beau, it just means she knows herself well enough to say she has enough on her plate.
4. They Are Not Ready To Be Vulnerable
It’s not uncommon to run into someone with a fear of commitment or intimacy. People can get too comfy with being unattached after traumatic or heartbreaking experiences, or they can be afraid of trusting another person if they’ve never been in any kind of close relationship before. Whatever the reason may be, some people take more time to open up to others.
5. They Still Need To Focus On Themselves
One life-saving thing I’ve learned from my relationships is that I can’t count on anyone to take care of me other than myself. I know when the time comes, life will bring me someone who treasures me more than life itself, but even that special someone can’t be there to pick up my messes 100% of the time. Everyone has hardships and tragedies in life when they need to focus on themselves and can’t be there for someone else no matter how much they want to. I’ll need to take care of myself then, and I need to take care of myself now, even if that means not being able to care for someone else sometimes.
6. They Don’t Want To Share Everything
There’s no shame in being selfish! We need to take care of ourselves and make ourselves happy. If a bed all to myself and a table for one makes a girl feel her best, she won’t give away her life of luxury to share her limelight.
7. They Are Just Not Interested
Anyone can find themselves in a position when they just aren’t attracted to the person who just asked them out, but a mature woman will be straightforward about it. She won’t lead you on or disrespect you, but a rejection like that is going to sting nonetheless. Sometimes, it is personal.