7 Signs You’re More Attractive Than You Realize
Hey Psych2Goers! What does it mean to be attractive? When you hear the word, what comes most immediately into your mind? It’s likely that when you hear the word ‘attractive’, you think of physical appearance first, but not always. Merriam-Webster defines an attractive person as “arousing interest or pleasure”. However, someone’s level of attraction towards you may not always be due to the way you physically look.
As the common phrase goes: “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” You may be viewed as attractive for many different reasons, other than just your physical appearance. These might even be reasons that you may not know about.
Here are ‘7 Signs You’re More Attractive Than You Realize’!
Disclaimer: This post is for educational purposes and is based on personal opinions. This post is not a substitute for professional advice, but general guidance. We advise you to always listen to your intuition and always do what is right for you.
#1. People Often Smile At You (Yes, You)
Do you find when posing for photographs that the whole process feels like a totally unnecessary ordeal? Does the experience make you feel super awkward and rather uncomfortable? Does the forced nature of holding a smile for an indeterminate number of seconds, pain you greatly? You’re not alone. You may look at those posed photos later on and cringe at how awkward it all feels. You might catch a candid photo of yourself, but this time your smile feels real. You may like that secret picture better, because it actually feels like the real authentic you.
When you’re out for a walk and someone passes by, do they smile at you? Is your first instinct to think they’re laughing at you? They’re probably not. Is there a gross mustard stain on your shirt? Nope. Did you forget to zip up your fly? Also nope. You definitely remembered. Is there someone else walking behind you that the person in question smiled at? Nope. It’s just you. Chances are that stranger thought you were attractive and smiled at you upon first blush. Feels good, doesn’t it?
It’s a natural impulse for strangers to look or stare slightly longer than normal at people they find attractive. Someone probably thought you were attractive and all you had to do was walk by. Are you also secretly a model? If not, maybe you should start!
#2. People Laugh At Your Jokes (For Real)
Having a sense of humour is often cited as being one of the key ingredients in an attractive pie. People gravitate towards those they find funny. That’s why there are so many stand-up comedy shows on Netflix. Is your brain a farm for all of the best jokes? Do you think of so many jokes off the top of your head that they often duke it out for “Best Joke Supremacy”? Having too many jokes in your head is definitely one of the better problems to have.
The great thing about comedy is that it’s subjective, and such a broad category. Your sense of humour can be anything you want it to be. As long as it’s not too offensive or overly mean. Knowing boundaries and reading the room can also help keep your jokes funny, and you more attractive.
There’s a very important difference between people laughing with you, rather than at you. You definitely want the first one. When people are belly-laughing at a great joke you told, you’ll know. If you ever find yourself struggling with telling good jokes, try watching some videos of comedians you like. You can learn a lot about comedy from your favourite people. Remember, comedy is all about… timing.
#3. You’re Genuinely Kind (Without Expecting Anything In Return)
To quote Jerry Maguire in his own movie, “We live in a cynical world. A cynical world.” That’s sadly very true. It’s unfortunately very easy to be cynical in today’s society, with so much bad going on these days. So much so, that it’s kind of a marvel when people go out of their way to help others. Being kind is kind of rare. Do you find it easy to put others before yourself? Are you often trying to find ways to assist people, without ever being asked? It’s very easy for people to know when you’re being fake.
Being a kind person is surprisingly not as common as you might think. If people say you’re kind, take it as a genuine compliment. They most likely mean it. Do you have a regular coffee shop that you go to the same day at the same time every single week? Are you a clockwork type of person? Chances are, that super cute barista you’ve been chatting up every Tuesday at 9AM remembers you. That is if you go in often enough. Ordering the exact same drink helps them remember you too. Not a bad plan.
You might go in one day though, and the lineup is out past the door. By the time you get up to order, the barista may look extremely burnt out and exhausted. Any other day, and they’d smile at your arrival, but not today. Instead, they just apologize profusely for taking so long. Taking a second to say it’s okay and they’re doing the best they can, will likely be very much appreciated. It costs nothing to be kind. Double check that they didn’t also write their number on your next coffee. That’s an absolute win. Even if they spelled your name on the cup completely wrong.
#4. People Ask You To Hang Out (Almost Too Often)
Does your phone constantly blow up with notifications? Are you glad the mute button exists? Do you get notifications, but don’t click on the message immediately? If you take time in replying back to messages, that can make you appear more attractive because you’re busy, or at least giving off the appearance of being busy. If you’re replying back too quickly to people, that may seem rather needy.
People may think that you have nothing else and/or better to do with your time. With the advent of texting and social media, we’re able to communicate instantly. People like spending time with those they’re attracted to. If people text you constantly wanting to hang out, it’s likely because they think you’re an attractive person to be around.
#5. You’re Super Ambitious (But Not Egotistical)
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend a day in the your comfy pyjamas. We all need days just to relax and take a break. Although, if all you ever do is lounge around, your friends and potential love interests may become frustrated with you. People tend to be attracted to those that are ambitious. Are you the kind of person that desires to be successful? Are you willing to work as hard as possible to achieve your dreams? If you’re an ambitious type of person, others may be drawn to you because of your desire to achieve those big dreams.
People are often attracted to those that are ambitious, because it may also remind them of the goals and dreams that they’re attempting to pursue themselves. If you have lofty goals and big aspirations, more people will likely believe in and be supportive of you. You hopefully already believe in and support yourself. It’s important to also remember your limits. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be successful.
It’s also impossible to do everything yourself. It’s okay to ask for help. If you are ambitious, people may also want to help you achieve your dreams. If that’s the case, don’t forget to thank them in the process. Being appreciative of someone’s help is never a bad idea.
#6. You’re Very Trustworthy (Even If You’re Not Trusting)
Have you had a hard-time trusting others? Does the idea of telling someone your deepest, darkest secret fill you with complete stress and anxiety? You may have a hard being open and honest with people. Even so, people may view you as a trustworthy individual. Do people come to you seemingly all the time with the most top secret information? Does the irony of this situation ring true?
People are drawn towards those that they feel like they can trust. Having trust is one of the most important elements to have in both friendships and relationships. Trust is so powerful, that it can take months or years to build, and only mere seconds to destroy.
Being a trustworthy person can also help with your job. If your boss knows you can be trusted, they’re more likely to give you tasks they know you can handle. This is a great way to work up the corporate ladder. If you are good at keeping secrets, just make sure to not be overwhelmed by too much information. If you’re keeping too many secrets, you may become a giant trust-balloon that’s ready to pop.
#7. You Radiate Positive Energy (The Best Kind)
One of the hardest things to do, is to remain positive throughout your day. It’s certainly easier said than done. When was the last time you had a truly fantastic day? What made it so wonderful? Were you with people when you felt happy? Or were you alone at the time? We all deserve our own happiness, but there are times where life is so tough, it seems like we may never achieve our goals. Especially the ambitious ones.
Are you the kind of person who shines through in a bad situation? Did your day just go from bad to worse, with every single possible bad thing climbing on top of each other? Are you able to see the good in a really awful situation? People are often attracted to those who can remain positive in the face of adversity. If you’re someone who is almost always negative, it’s possible that people may go out of their way to avoid you. They may not want to be around that kind of energy. That’s totally fair.
You’re certainly allowed to have a bad day here and there. If your bad day turns into a bad week and then a bad month or year, people may be less prone to enjoy your company. Remaining positive is one of the hardest things you can do when life gives you those proverbial lemons. People however, like spending time with those that make them lemonade.
Did any of these points feel familiar to you? Or were you totally surprised to learn that you match with at least a couple of things mentioned? Were you connected with all seven? What does that feel like for you? Does your friend or significant other match any of the above-listed criteria?
People like to be with those that share their views and beliefs about the world. You most likely spend your time with others that feel the same way you do. Similarities between people are likely to draw them together. Differences will likely tear them apart. Do you struggle with your thoughts and feelings? Are you not happy with the way you look? Maybe giving a try to something from here can help you out. If you start feeling better about yourself, others will most likely notice, and hopefully follow suit.
What other key factors in someone’s attractiveness were missed?
The studies and references used herein are listed in the description below.
Until next time!
Merriam Webster Definitions https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/attractive
‘4 Qualities Most People Find Truly Attractive’ by Sira Mas (December 6th, 2021) https://medium.com/personal-growth/4-qualities-most-people-find-truly-attractive-a5498f7ab5fd
‘Jerry Maguire 1996 Ending’ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k94XzEOukUQ