How Do You Gracefully Close An Exceptional, Medicore and Bad Date?

After a first date with a 26 year old Indian UC Davis Med Student some time ago, my (already extremely) analytical self sat in bed for a few hours reading up on how to properly close a date.

The closure of a date, whether that be an exceptional, mediocre or bad one, is vital and can potentially showcase your interest or non-interest.

*** As you two are walking to the car ***

“Thank you very much for dinner. I really appreciate it! Here, I’ll give you a hug.”

***Gives hug and makes sure lips are NOT in close proximate whatsoever for a potential kiss ***

If a woman said this to you at the end of a date, would you assume she’s not interested?

  • She CLEARLY indirectly stated that she will not kiss you.
  • She also didn’t propose a potential desire to hangout again.
  • She didn’t propose you to text/call her again.

That exact statement is how I end 95% of my dates. The other 5% of dates might just catch me in a wohoo moment, but, for the most part, I ideally don’t kiss on the first date nor am I ever the type to initiate/demand a man to contact me. I always held a belief that if a man wanted a second date, he should be assertive enough to ask me without me informing him I wanted a second date. Also, many dates I’ve been on, I always felt this semi-awkward tension at the end and sensed that the guy wasn’t sure how to close it, so I jumped into saying the above statement.

But, I’m thinking: does that showcase that I’m uninterested?  🙁

Okay, so a few hours of my Monday night (yes, you read that right…a few hours) were devoted to reading up on how to successfully end a date. Here’s my insight + what datingdirectaffinity.com suggest:

If the date was exceptional, don’t be shy

Individuals tend to respond well when others find them likeable. If you’re date went well, there’s already a (small) foundation, so you’re not taking a risky leap by saying: “Thank you very much for spending time with me. I had a great time and I would enjoy seeing you again!”

 Unsure if they’re interested?

You want to take a similar approach to not being shy, but don’t be as aggressive as directly saying: “I want to see you again! When are you free?” If you’re unsure of how they feel, gently suggest this: “I really enjoyed our date, please give me a call/text if you want to meet up again.” This is a statement and doesn’t pressure the individual to give you an immediate answer. They can simply say: “Oh sure, of course I’l let you know!”

Don’t fake interest if it’s not there

You must respect your date but (gentle) honesty is necessary. If you don’t want a second date, don’t give them any sort of hope. You may simply end the date with a: “Thank you for spending time with me. Let me give you a hug. Have a good rest of the day/night.” If they end up contacting you for a 2nd date, politely inform them you don’t see romantic compatibility, but wish them nothing but the best. (Or you could simply not reply like a million people do, but I’ve always found that to be rude!)

What’s your insight on how to successfully close a date? Do you think there were ever times in which you automatically assumed your date was uninterested due to their indirect words/body language and so you didn’t proceed on with another date?

I’m going to utilize these simple suggestions and let you peeps know how it goes!

Xoxo,

Chrissy

http://www.datingdirectaffinity.com/misc/advices_online.php?article=21

https://www.lds.org/new-era/2014/08/the-dating-academy-sign-up-today?lang=eng

https://www.lds.org/new-era/2014/08/the-dating-academy-sign-up-today?lang=eng

http://beautyandvirtue.com/2014/11/03/how-to-reject-a-guy-after-the-first-few-dates/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2472451/The-hardest-thing-romance-later-life-Making-love-lights-As-film-explores-angst-post-divorce-dating-LINDA-KELSEY-shares-experiences.html

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