The Rise of Female Loneliness

They say loneliness is a silent epidemic; many of us suffer from it, but most don’t talk about it. You might see people looking happy and social online, but many of them feel isolated. Despite living in the age of the internet and social media, people are feeling lonelier than ever. According to a recent survey by Meta-Gallup, nearly 1 in every 4 adults all over the world report feeling very or fairly lonely, with most of them being young adults (aged 19-29). A psychological study by Romero and Epkins also found that loneliness tends to be greater and more common among females. But why? Let’s dive into a few reasons, according to experts:

The Pressure of Perfection

Ever noticed how girls from younger generations tend to mature faster? Tweens nowadays are wearing a full face of makeup, dressed in revealing clothes, and dancing provocatively on TikTok because of social media’s unrealistic expectations of female bodies, appearance, and hyper-sexualization. They’re pressured to go from 12 to 21 seemingly overnight because “cringe culture” has made them all overly self-conscious. The pressure to look, act, and live perfectly takes away the genuine experiences that help form deep, personal connections. Think about it: how can you really bond with someone if you’re always pretending to have it all together?

The Comparison Trap

Social media has made women more likely to compare themselves to others, and constantly measuring yourself against curated perfection can intensify feelings of envy, inadequacy, and loneliness. Because platforms like TikTok and Instagram focus so much on looks and popularity, it can pit women against each other, leading to a sense of rivalry and competition that keeps them from forming connections and community. 

The Superwoman Syndrome

Have you ever felt like you’re doing so much but not truly connecting with anyone? Today’s society often glorifies being busy and always on the go. And because of “modern feminism”, women are often expected to excel in every aspect of life — career, family, friendships, personal growth. It’s like you need to be a superwoman to keep up. But this constant balancing act of trying to juggle so many different roles can leave you feeling overwhelmed and unsupported. When you’re spread too thin, this can leave little time for genuine connections and can make you feel isolated, even if you’re always around people.

Changing Social Norms & Expectations

Speaking of “modern feminism,” recent shifts in gender roles and expectations can make it seem like being a mother or a wife isn’t enough. Society now values career success and personal achievement so highly that these traditional roles have become undervalued. And with more people renting, moving, and migrating, living with extended family or in close-knit neighborhoods are less common. The rise in female loneliness partly stems from this conflict, as women struggle to balance societal expectations with their own desires in an increasingly individualistic world that misunderstands and overlooks them.

But traditional expectations can also discourage women from prioritizing their own needs, leading to emotional exhaustion and isolation. Psychologist Dr. Lisa Firestone notes that this emotional labor, often invisible, can significantly impact mental health and feelings of connectedness.

Economic & Career Pressures

For women who are career-focused on the other hand, the pursuit of professional success can sometimes come at the cost of personal relationships. While having career ambitions and pursuing higher education are certainly positive, they can also lead to longer working hours and less time for social interactions. Not only that, competitiveness in the workplace may cause rifts in relationships. For example, women in leadership roles often face negative stereotypes (e.g. being seen as “bossy”) and may feel isolated, judged, and unsupported at work.

The Failings of Modern Dating

Hookups, flings, getting ghosted, getting catfished — modern dating is like a revolving door of fleeting encounters, don’t you think? Thanks to dating apps and our busy lifestyles, this fast-paced, impersonal approach to love leaves many women feeling disconnected and alone. Although it’s easier than ever to meet people nowadays, it’s become incredibly difficult to find someone willing to put in the time, effort, and commitment into building a meaningful relationship. We talk more about this in our videos “Harsh Truths About Modern Dating (Real Struggles)” and “You’re Not Broken, The Dating World Is.”

So, did this video emotionally resonate with you? It’s okay to feel lonely; you’re not alone in your struggle. If you found this video valuable, please like and share it with others to spread awareness. Comment your insights, encouragements, and stories down below. And subscribe to our channel for more thought-provoking mental health content like “Why Does Today’s World Make You So LONELY?” and “MOST Relationships Today Are TOXIC, Here’s Why.” Thanks for watching!

References:

• Nicioli, T. (2023 Oct 24). The loneliness epidemic: Nearly 1 in 4 adults feel lonely, new survey finds. CNN Health. https://edition.cnn.com/2023/10/24/health/lonely-adults-gallup-poll-wellness/index.html 
• Romero, L. E., & Epkins, C. C. (2008). Girls’ cognitions of hypothetical friends: Are they related to depression, loneliness, social anxiety and perceived similarity?. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 25(2), 311-332. 
• Uguru, H. (2022 May 29). Tackling the Loneliness Epidemic in Teenage Girls and Young Women. Maya Centre. https://www.mayacentre.org.uk/tackling-loneliness-epidemic-teenage-girls-young-women/ 
• Medical Channel Asia (2024 Jan 30). Gen Z Loneliness: Why the Youngest Generation Feels So Alone. https://medicalchannelasia.com/gen-z-loneliness-why-the-youngest-generation-feels-so-alone/ 
• Jenkins, R. (2022 Aug 16). 3 Things Making Gen Z the Loneliest Generation. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-case-connection/202208/3-things-making-gen-z-the-loneliest-generation 
• Nelson, A. (2022 Jan 4). Ambition: Femininity and Climbing the Ladder of Success. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/he-speaks-she-speaks/202201/ambition-femininity-and-climbing-the-ladder-success