7 Habits That Make You Emotionally Weak

Do you consider yourself emotionally strong? Emotional strength is the ability to be resilient and handle your emotions healthily. On the other hand, emotional weakness is not being able to regulate or express your emotions in a healthy, well-balanced way. It can affect many aspects of your life, such as your decision-making, social interactions, and routines. However, it isn’t anyone’s fault, nor is it something to be ashamed of. Instead, what you can do is learn and figure out how to cope with it. With this in mind, here are 7 habits that make you emotionally weak.   

1. Not believing in yourself 

What’s something you think you’re bad at? How many times have you genuinely tried that activity after deciding you’re no good at it? What you may not realize is that one initial failure doesn’t mean you aren’t gifted or talented enough for something. If you believe everything you initially think, you’ll likely end up limiting and dragging yourself down. In psychology, this is called a self-fulfilling prophecy. Simply put, if you believe something is true, you’ll subconsciously go out of your way to affirm it. For example, if you believe you’ll fail a math test, you’re much more likely to do worse since you have such low confidence. What this means is not having faith in yourself makes you both emotionally weak and perform worse.  

2. Not taking care of yourself   

Do you struggle with taking breaks when needed? While it sounds counterintuitive, in our work-oriented society, it’s sometimes harder to rest than keep pushing yourself to the limit. Emotionally weak people tend to base their self-worth on their achievements, status, or finances instead of who they are as a person. After all, regardless of how often we hear the phrase “Love yourself,” it’s still incredibly hard to put into practice. This can lead to many problems such as avoiding self-care, not prioritizing your physical health, and burnout. You may not realize it, but there is strength in taking a break. After all, your worth isn’t based upon what you do; instead, it’s based on who you are.   

3. Making decisions based upon emotions instead of values   

Have you ever regretted letting your initial reaction to something get out of control? If so, you know all about letting your emotions get the best of you. Emotional weakness means not being able to balance your emotions with your morals and logic. This means you tend to think with your heart, not your head. While how you feel should be a factor in your decisions, if it is the driving force, you could make impulsive, uninformed, or dramatic choices. So, the next time you’re faced with a difficult decision, try to identify the emotion you’re feeling and see whether it’s outweighing your values and reason.  

4. Judging yourself for how you feel   

Do you always think to yourself phrases like, “This isn’t a normal feeling,” or, “I shouldn’t feel like this since no one else does?” It may be easy to judge yourself for how you feel, but doing so can have many unintended consequences. It makes you emotionally weaker, and it could also cause you to suppress, deny, or deflect your emotions. In reality, your emotions are one of the biggest indicators as to what you should and shouldn’t do, your boundaries, and what you enjoy. They serve to guide you, so you should always try to remember that all feelings are valid and deserve to be expressed.   

5. Needing to find a reason behind everything   

Do you believe in the phrase, “Everything happens for a reason?” Whether you do or don’t, trying to find reason in everything may end up making you emotionally weaker. If you can’t accept that sometimes things you cannot explain or rationalize happen, you could end up spending more time overthinking and analyzing than taking action and looking for ways to cope. Luck is a big factor in life, and a huge sign of emotional strength is being able to recognize and accept that.   

6. Trying to control and plan everything   

Do you have your whole life mapped out? You know exactly what career you want, if you’ll get married, if you want kids, and more. While making a timeline is a great way to get a general idea of what you want in life, almost nothing goes according to plan. If you become too set on one path, you could become close-minded and miss many opportunities simply because you weren’t looking. You may also end up becoming less emotionally flexible, meaning if anything goes wrong, you’re more likely to fall apart than adapt. Finally, similar to needing to find a reason behind everything, you could spend more time preparing than actually doing. The bottom line is a key part of emotional strength is accepting you cannot foresee everything, no matter how scary that sounds.   

7. Letting others control you   

Have you ever bought something just because it was popular? Being able to stand out from the crowd and be yourself is a huge sign of emotional strength. On the other hand, when you let others influence you, you might prioritize their needs over your own and end up making choices that don’t benefit you. Others could recognize this emotional weakness and try to take advantage of you. So, while it might be hard, you should try to remember that your wants and needs are ultimately the most important factor in your life.   

Emotional weakness isn’t something to be ashamed of. It takes time, energy, and experience to become emotionally stronger, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you’re not there yet. The most important thing is to remember to be patient and kind to yourself as you continue to emotionally grow and mature.  

Do you have any of these habits? If so, do you think this article helped you recognize them? Feel free to leave a comment down below with your thoughts, experiences, or suggestions!   

References

References

• Sanford. (2019, June 13). Examining how people’s emotions are influenced by others. Stanford News. https://news.stanford.edu/2019/06/13/examining-peoples-emotions-influenced-others/.
• Patel, J. (2019, February 12). Consequences of Repression of Emotion: Physical Health, Mental Health and General Well Being. Pen Access Pub. https://openaccesspub.org/ijpr/article/999.
• Dunn, E. (2014). Social Interactions and Well-Being: The Surprising Power of Weak Ties, 2014. SAGE Journals. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0146167214529799.