8 Signs You’re Not an Introvert, but a Shy Extrovert

Have you considered yourself an introvert for a long time but find yourself doing stuff that doesn’t fit into the criteria?

For starters, do you not mind being around people?

Do you like mingling and going to events?

Say no more, because there are people called shy extroverts, and you just might be one of them!

So if you want to know about it, what it means, and if you’re truly one for the team, please read ahead!

FRIENDLY DISCLAIMER: This video is for educational purposes and is based on personal opinions. This video is not a substitute for professional advice, but general guidance. We advise you to always listen to your intuition and always do what is right for you.

1. You have no problems connecting with people.

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Do you have no difficulty getting to know someone?

Sure, approaching them can be quite daunting, but once you’ve met and engaged in conversation, do you find yourself naturally going with the flow of things?

This is a sign that you’re not an introvert but rather a sensitive or shy extrovert.

Introverts can feel quite drained by interaction. They also tend to be quiet, which can intimidate some.

You may not always be boisterous and flamboyant, but shy extroverts usually get into the scheme of things once the conversation has begun.

And that’s great! It means that you do well in dealing with others, and at the same time don’t have the penchant to rush into things too quickly.

2. You don’t turn down invitations to hang out.

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Are you always present in group gatherings?

Let’s say your friend calls you for a spontaneous cafe hangout session, are you immediately outside the door?

Introverts prefer having a lot of me-time.

They take that moment to recharge because they genuinely enjoy their own company.

Extroverts like going out, socializing, and having fun.

For them, life is all about being with people.

So if you tremendously enjoy public events but don’t know how to go without someone inviting you, you’re most likely a shy introvert.

Big thanks to all your supportive friends who always include you in the fun!

3. You’re not that bothered when the conversation gets silent.

Do you welcome pauses in conversations?

Introverts, while talking, usually don’t know what to say, or how to keep the energy going.

Extroverts, on the other hand, welcome discussions and most likely talk animatedly without stopping.

A shy extrovert would appreciate conversations while having pauses in between.

This gives them time to think, sort out their ideas, and identify how to continue the discussion in the best way.

This type of silence bothers full extroverts because it can make them feel like the vibe is dying down. They would most likely try to avoid it by talking more or doing something else.

So if you’re the type who doesn’t mind it that much, consider it a blessing because hey, you’ve got quite a handle on conversations!

4. You dislike talking to large crowds because it’s not as effective.

Do you get stage fright or jitters right before performances or speeches of any kind?

You may think that this is a sure sign that you’re an introvert, but in actuality, even extroverts get jittery during public events, too!

It’s perfectly normal.

It just means that you care how you appear to others and that you want them to like what you’re doing or what you’re going to say.

Some extroverts will be naturals on stage, while shy extroverts tend to be more uncomfortable.

Shy extroverts would be more willing to talk to people on a one-on-one basis where there’s not as much pressure involved.

You would be able to get your point across more clearly and build a unique relationship with whoever you’re talking to, unlike the uncertain nerve-wracking situation that is public speaking.

5. You don’t mind some attention.

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Introverts may get uncomfortable when faced with a lot of attention while extroverts most likely flourish in it.

If you occasionally like being around groups of people, you’re probably a shy extrovert.

You may feel that you don’t have to be the main attraction, it just feels nice to be with some people and have fun with them!

It won’t bother you when a lot of people are around, but there will be times you want to be alone, too.

And that balance is a very nice thing to have.

6. You choose your friends wisely while still being sociable.

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Do you have a small, precious set of close friends?

Extroverts tend to socialize a lot. This means that they get to know a lot of people at a rapid rate, probably without being able to filter which ones they like or not.

Introverts have their group of friends, too, but the difference is that they probably wouldn’t be as willing to meet new people all the time because the interaction can exhaust them.

Shy extroverts would be open to meeting new people, but they tend to take it to step by step.

Do you like getting to know someone first before considering them as your friend?

Do you like having deep, lengthy conversations?

Because of those habits, choosing your friends comes naturally to you.

By asking the real questions, you get to know someone and can decide if you want them in your life as a constant or just an acquaintance.

7. You communicate with others regularly.

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As mentioned, introverts like to have a lot of alone time.

It’s their moment to do their own thing and relax without other people’s eyes weighing on their back.

They may disappear for inconsistent periods and only come back when needed.

It’s just their inclination, and they feel happiest that way.

But if you’re a shy extrovert, you may notice that although you enjoy your own company, you also prioritize being able to talk to your favorite people regularly.

Do you have people you chat with every day?

Do you get sad when days pass without hearing from someone?

For you, constant interaction may be nice for a lot of reasons, including having someone to talk to about your feelings and emotions.

This is good because talking to other people is vital to your physical and emotional well-being (Gordon, 2021).

By doing so, you’re relieving your stress and reducing the feeling of loneliness.

So if you haven’t talked to a friend today and told them about how great they are, take this as a sign to drop that message or ring that phone call.

8. You crave being liked by others more than the average introvert.

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Do other people’s opinions about you matter a lot?

Do you work hard on building great first impressions?

Wanting to be liked by the general majority is another sign that you’re an extrovert, whether a shy one or not.

This doesn’t mean that introverts don’t care about other opinions whatsoever.

The difference is that introverts are usually content with their small circle of friends, while you may want to be liked more than that. 

To add, a lot of extroverts are people pleasers.

Now, before you get worried and say “What?! I’m a people pleaser?” try to keep in mind that it’s not a bad thing.

Wanting to please others just means you want to develop good relationships all around.

It can even motivate you into pushing your limits and becoming a better version of yourself.

However, it helps to keep it within a certain line.

You don’t need other people’s validation to feel complete, because true love always comes first from yourself.

Let other people become your motivation, not your lifeline.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS

So… are you officially a shy extrovert?

Which point did you relate to the most?

Please share some of your experiences in the comment section below.

We appreciate hearing about your stories. Maybe some people can even relate to them. Go, shy extroverts!

Thank you so much for reading this article. See you next time!

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REFERENCES

Booth, J. (2018, March 27). 9 things all extroverts want all introverts to know. HelloGiggles. Retrieved February 18, 2022, from https://hellogiggles.com/lifestyle/extroverts-want-introverts-know/#:%7E:text=Extroverts%2C%20on%20the%20other%20hand,or%20just%20talk%20a%20lot.

Gordon, S. (2021, September 1). How to Find Connection When You Really Need It. Verywell Mind. Retrieved February 18, 2022, from https://www.verywellmind.com/what-to-do-when-you-need-someone-to-talk-to-5089236#:%7E:text=Having%20someone%20to%20talk%20to%20is%20vital%20to%20your%20physical,improve%20your%20social%20support%20system.

Rogers, K. (2021, January 21). 7 Things Extroverts Want You to Know. Blush Life Coaching. Retrieved February 18, 2022, from https://joinblush.com/extroverts-want-you-to-know/

Rosselit, B. (2015, September 30). 9 Signs That You Are Actually A Shy Extrovert. Lifehack. Retrieved February 18, 2022, from https://www.lifehack.org/315307/9-signs-that-you-are-actually-shy-extrovert

Wiest, B. (2019, November 15). 16 Signs You’re Not Actually An Introvert, You’re A Highly Sensitive Extrovert. Thought Catalog. Retrieved February 18, 2022, from https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2017/03/16-signs-youre-not-actually-an-introvert-youre-a-highly-sensitive-extrovert/

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