10 Signs You’ve Pissed an Extrovert Off
In response to one of our more popular video on signs you’ve ticked off an introvert, we thought we respect extroverts as well by creating an article!
When you are looking through an extrovert or an introvert ‘window’ or even that of an ambivert, it can be tricky to see if someone is angry at you.
There’s a lot of information out there on introversion, but we also want to pay attention to extroversion. Of course you are not out to piss extroverts off, but it can be trickier to tell when you’ve pissed an extrovert off. When you are looking through the ‘window’ of an extrovert or an introvert, or even an ambivert, it can be tricky to gauge when someone is pissed off or not. These are 10 signs that could indicate an extroverted person you know is pissed off at you.
We’ll be referring to ‘the extrovert’ – not because they are some otherwordly species (they are not, they are just individuals who get more energy from being around others) – for the sake of neutrality.
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The Extrovert suddenly seems less bubbly, less extroverted.
Extroverts do not (always) show their anger in the way you expect, perhaps especially if you look at it from the perspective of a non-extrovert, such as an introvert or an ambivert. You might expect an extrovert to be very vocal about being pissed off. While that does happen of course, it is actually more common for them to become less extroverted. When they are angry, many extroverts told us, they tend to become calmer, less extroverted because they are occupied with the thing they are angry about.
“I think the extroverts main feature has always been our outgoing personality. So when someone ticks you off, you take that away. You won’t hear from me. You won’t get invited to all the events I plan. And if someone mentions you, I just ignore it. None of my energy goes to that person. Just switch off.” – anonymous
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An extrovert is still extroverted, but their extroversion suddenly seems a bit off, a bit robotic or unnatural. They pretend everything is okay.
Some other extroverts told us that they tend to stay extroverted, and try to pretend everything is okay. When this happens, however, it results in a slightly robotic air around their behaviour, because it is costing energy to force themselves to be extroverted when they are actually not feeling like it.
“I force myself to pretend everything is okay until I can let of steam somewhere, but I think they notice something’s off.” – Ethan
They might refuse to make eye contact with you, and look down to avoid your gaze.(please help us find the right credit for this photograph)
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The extrovert’s response…
While they are normally quite happy to engage in personal contact, as that is how extroverts tend to re-energize themselves, they tend to like it less when angry. Even if it is not specifically you they’re angry at, short responses can indicate something is the matter.
“I just fall back to one word response if someone asks me anything.” – Josh
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An extrovert (suddenly) wants to hang out less with you than with other people.
However, when it seems specifically aimed at you, you might want to retrace your (social) steps. What could have happened that they do not want to hang out with you but do want to hang out with others? Is it something they have done and feel guilty about, or could it be that you accidentally said something they interpreted negatively?
“I might avoid them a little.” – anonymous
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An extrovert is in a group having a good time, but they seem colder when they notice you.
When we asked extroverts, many said that they got cold towards the person they’re angry about. Many said this was because they do not want to let it affect their mood towards the others. So they’ll be as normal as possible to the others, but might act a little different towards the person they’re angry about. “I’m quiet and broody when I’m pissed off. Which is odd because I’m a loud and outgoing person usually, but when I’m really really REALLY pissed off, I’m dead silent. I also tend to distance myself? And if the person goes up to me, I’m cold and indifferent.” – anonymous
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Especially when they are an extrovert who usually enjoys small talk, the absence of small talk is a ‘good’ sign that there’s something off.
Many that identify as extrovert, when pissed off, stop initiating conversation with others. Either they wait more to be talked to, or stop talking in general. They go a bit quiet. “If I’m only a little bit annoyed I might snap or generally be short with them, but I won’t yell. I might just turn my attention away from them.” – anonymous
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The extrovert stops talking.
When they are angry those who identify as extrovert can also shut down. They’ll say as little as possible or nothing at all. One word answers are a sign that tells you that they’re pissed off. Also, it can be sign that you might be better off just leaving them alone for a while.
“When someone has pissed me off a little bit I will yell at them, but when I’m really hurt I go silent towards them.” – anonymous -
They won’t smile
Of course, extroverted doesn’t mean they are happy all the time, we all have ups and downs. When an extrovert is pissed off, it can show in the frequency of smiles. They’re outgoing-ness is diminished by their negative emotions, and that’s why they’ll smile less. This can happen to one particular person, or might happen in their general behavior.
“I stop smiling and get very short when people try to ask me what’s the matter.” – anonymous
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They avoid company or conversation.
Some also told us that when they are angry they tend to avoid people, which is (generally speaking) against what extroverts tend to do to gain energy.
“It usually shows by me becoming real quiet and avoiding a conversation. I seem to back off and try to avoid conflict, not wanting to draw that kind of attention towards me.” – anonymous -
They, the extrovert that is, do not return your calls.
When you call or text them about what is wrong, they either stay offline or leave you on read.
You’d be better off approaching them at another moment.Even though extroverts usually love being around people more than introverts, as this doesn’t cost them as much energy, when they are angry they might just rather be alone. That’s why they won’t answer your messages as much
“I don’t answer the phone when I’m pissed off. I don’t want to be angry at them. I’ll just cool off for a while and come back online when I feel like talking to them again.” – anonymous
Give this video, we created on how to tell when an introvert is angry. Please watch and support us!
This article was super interesting. Especially since I have a lot of friends who are extroverts. It really helps me read people’s moods toward me when I have tips like these.
As an extrovert, I found these things very true. I do most, if not all, of these things when I am mad at someone. I have found though that these things aren’t always useful because it can be very passive aggressive, ad I know a few very passive aggressive extroverts who will just ignore you until they forgive you.
This article was very helpful to me. Being the total introvert that I am, I never really thought about what the extroverts did when they were angry. I guess I always assumed they would straight up yell at me if they were angry at me. Now that I know that that isn’t true, I might be able to tell when I have made an extrovert angry.
This was so interesting! My husband who is much more extraverted, totally acts the same way when he is upset. It’s good to know, especially since I am much more of an introvert. From my perspective as an introvert, it’s great to see different signs of anger in different personality types. I often expect people to act they way I do when I’m upset, or explode in anger. I’m glad this article helped me understand my extrovert husband and friends better.
Although I am an extrovert, I am hardly ever extremely pissed off or upset. I experience some of these signs when I am grumpy or hungry. I have observed that these signs are common with my girlfriend’s extroverted friends. I have many extroverted friends and these signs will be more evident now that I have learned what the majority of them are.
10 Signs You’ve Pissed an Extrovert
Generally:
I really enjoyed this article being an introvert. It was a good look on the other side of the spectrum to see what makes them tick and to be given the tools to recognize and understand the tall tale signs of that they are pissed. I think the article was most effective when each point was explained and elaborated and then subsequently corroborated by an actual quotation by an extrovert. Not only does this provide evidence to support the point, but it gives it credibility.
I got distracted sometimes by the lack of commas and some punctuation/numbering issues, but other than that it was an easy and enlightening read.
Structure: The structure was done really well. I loved the intro, but had a couple of suggestions (see below) to bolster its effectiveness.
Comments by Paragraph
Clear and short and concise hook leading to the meat of the article. I appreciated it as a reader because I knew what to expect and gained some background as to where the conversation arose and it’s direction moving forward.
The lines “it can be tricky to gauge when someone is pissed off or not. These are 10 signs that could indicate an extroverted person you know is pissed off at you” was used twice in the first two paragraphs, which weakens the effectiveness of this line. I suggest removing it from the second paragraph. The second paragraph is best served with the first two sentences you use because you went from the general topic in the first paragraph to highlighting if/when you’ve pissed an extrovert off.
I love the definition of extrovert in the third paragraph. I believe having the broadest audience is key to a successful article. Here the definition serves as reiteration to those psychology experts, but also provides a friendly invitation to new comers as well. The grammar though just needs some cleaning up (i.e. close the parenthesis).
Number 1
I love the structure of how you brought this to light by making sure you weren’t painting a broad stroke by placing the “do not (always).” Furthermore, the effectiveness of this point was when you went about to describe how they are not as vocal when angry, but then provided concrete backing by an actual extrovert to bring home the point.
Number 2
Perfect short and concise with the main point being “because it is costing energy to force themselves to be extroverted.” The subsequent physical signs of refusal of eye contact is a perfect ending to bridge the extrovert’s feelings to the extrovert’s action.
Number 3
The title would best be served by retitling it “The extrovert’s responses to questions…” to provide brevity and clarity.
Number 4
I love this because it causes the reader to be engaged by forcing them to look introspectively to see whether or not they participated in the muddy of the extrovert. It opens the dialogue of the reader to judge both the extrovert and the participant as well.
Number 5
The “reALLY” pissed off would be most effective if all the letters were in bold.
Number 6
“Either their wait more” should be corrected to “either they’ll wait more.” This line “If I’m only a little bit annoyed I might snap or generally be short with them but I won’t yell. I might just turn my attention away from them,” would be stronger if commas were correctly used and inserted to help the reader.
Number 8 should be renumbered to 7 and that will fix why there’s two 10s.
This is a great insight into the minds of extroverts. Extroverts are often overlooked while more attention is brought to introverts, so I appreciate an article focusing on the thought process of extroverts. It’s hard to read when someone is pissed, especially when you’re an introvert and they’re an extrovert.
I agree with many of Alex’s points, specifically refining the grammar and the effectiveness of “it can be tricky to gauge when someone is pissed off or not. These are 10 signs that could indicate an extroverted person you know is pissed off at you.” I was also hoping to see more quotes from extroverts as citations for your many signs. While your prose is insightful, providing evidence for every point strengthens them and adds credibility. Proof of a sign enhances its value for the reader.
It seems that an extrovert acting like the opposite of an extrovert carries over in many of the signs (1, 3, 4, 6-10). If they act isolated and seem less energetic, they’re probably mad at you. While each sign provides a different point, expanding on each one or even providing more quotes/examples would help to separate the main tell of not acting like an extrovert. It would also give more context and enhance the overall sign. For example, the first 10, “They avoid company or conversation” is similar to 8, the last 10, 6 and 4. There isn’t much context aside from the quote, so a little elaboration would help single it out.
I hope my comments are of some help with your future writing! Refer to Alex’s comments for specific grammar issues, I didn’t want to restate what he said.
Great article! As an introvert this gives plenty of insight into the opposite end of the spectrum, as well as providing some handy pointers on why its best not to piss an introvert off! The article is very well presented, and listed in such a way so that the reader can constantly be hooked by the feeling of curiosity. A few suggestions just to make sure your next article is just as good.
Firstly, make sure to proof read your work once, twice, and then a third time! The spelling in this article is good, however the brief slip up in the phrase “Either their wait more” should be rectified, as it should read “either they’ll wait more.” Nothing major, but you dont want to confuse your readers.
Secondly, with this kind of article it can be tricky to include multiple (named and constant) peoples opinions, however I suggest giving it a go next time as you can never have too many constant voices in an article such as this. Of course keep your opinions as the main focus of the article, as well as any research you conduct. Just make sure that others get the chance to express their own opinions as one or two voices is effective, but several together make a much louder point.
Thirdly, you give very sound advice as well as solid options. Although its hard, I suggest including any experienced events that can contribute to the article. Although difficult and sometimes impossible, It can make the article even more relate able over all, allowing the readers to connect to the author.
Lastly, I also suggest using more punctuation to give your article even more expression! Considering this one in particular is on an emotion, the more punctuation (primarily exclamation marks) you include the better.
Overall it’s a wonderfully fun article, I look forward to seeing more!
This is a great article! Supplies ten points with elaboration for easy comprehension! Intercommunication I can be a challenge with many invisible cues, this list is applicable!
From a personal perspective as an introvert married to an extrovert, who doesn’t like to “cause waves”, the lack of small talk is a red flag! Also the easiest, because one could always be unhappy about something else.
The force of this article is that its author presents the topic of extroversion, a topic that is often underlooked in the media in favor of introversion, in a well-researched informative, cohesive and relatable manner that will not only be interesting to introverts but to extroverts as well. In fact, while introverts, much like myself, might become more aware of these signs of extroversion, extroverts might identify to the testimonials and perhaps find solutions to their anger.
However, on a few occasions, the author writes with redundancy, especially in regards to the topic of the loss of exuberance, a rise in social avoidance as well as deliberate isolation. This might disinterest the reader, depending on if he or she has previously understood the content.
Initially this is a great read, and I think with some minor tweaking, it could be even better.
1. Title is great – but a little trite. I think you can reinforce what the issue and solution is – you discuss pissing off an extrovert, but how can someone recover from pissing off an extrovert? Adding these pieces would be key to making your article stand out from the general “this is what is meant to be an extrovert”. Perhaps, “10 Signs You’ve Pissed Off an Extrovert (And How to Recover)”. Give the audience some reason to believe that your article is different from the other extrovert vs introvert pieces.
2. Consider how much we see about introverts and extroverts in the media (and how much of it isn’t true!). I would briefly define with a quick source (Myers-Briggs) what it truly means to be an introvert/extrovert. I noticed you had a brief snippet about you’re defined by how you relax – I understand this because I’ve taken Myers Briggs and am a psych student, but this may sound a little off to the common person. Even adding a quick link to a cool quiz or more thorough explanation would suffice.
3. Your invitation to share – I would take this a step further and ask “How do you come back from being pissed off?” or “what are some of the ways help your extroverted friend calm down”. This is an option to share the audience’s opinion and people love that.
4. The quotes add to each piece is AMAZING. Some of them are shorter than others, and the shorter ones lack some of that “real time passion” that the longer ones have when they are also under a shorter paragraph. If you have a long explanation, your quote is dessert, but if your paragraph content is short, your quote now acts the main course and your paragraph is the appetizer.
5. Use of images, I would make sure to stick with images that really add and not distract to your message. You the extra flair to support your point, and not just seem like it randomly fit.
6. Add a conclusion to tie it all together.
Overall, great work! Hope this helps!
This article is very accurate. As an extrovert, I essentially shut down when I’m mad or sad. The most hilarious part of this post, however, was reading the extremely detailed critique comments afterwards! I was reminded of all my INTP friends.