It’s hard to talk about things. That’s why sugarcoating exists. Pain, in fact, makes some of the world’s greatest actors, because they know which face to put on to hide it. As we go through life, we accumulate more difficulties along the way. It’s impossible not to feel jaded at times and we may often find ourselves on the verge of giving up. But, not all hope has to be lost. Psych2Go shares with you 5 things to remember when your life is falling apart:

1. Pain is temporary.

I know it might not seem like it right this second, but everything you’re going through right now will pass. Even the heaviest rain storms eventually find calm. Whether you’re going through a breakup, job loss, or the death of a loved one, things will eventually stabilize again. You may not always fully recover from traumatic events depending on the severity of them and grieving is never a linear process. Some days, you may plunge back into the familiar darkness and wonder when it’ll stop feeling heavy.

But no matter how brief, subtle, or unpredictable, there will always be moments of light you’ll find in between. Sometimes, pain doesn’t listen to our pleas for instant gratification. Instead, it asks for patience. The heart is a strange place. Just as equally as it knows how to drown, it also knows how to endure.

2. Realize that you have what it takes to turn things around.

We don’t get to choose where we come from, but we can still manage to do things to take us where we want to be. If you find yourself in a dead end job or don’t feel as passionate about what you’re studying, know that the situation won’t change unless you make one. Sometimes, it may take more than a few tries until you feel satisfied.

But, people are often scared to make changes because they’re afraid of disappointing themselves if things don’t work out. I know, because I’ve been there. Maybe I’m still there. Admitting it isn’t easy. We’ve become a world driven by results more than giving ourselves credit for the risks we do take to better our lives. Don’t focus so much on what may fall further apart, but rather on what can fall into place.

3. Allow what you can’t control to just be.

It’s great to take responsibility for your own actions and be proactive. This is how you can live an active, meaningful life when you strive for your goals and dreams. But, it’s important to recognize that there is only so much we have control over. Instead of analyzing the things we think we can prevent or taking extreme precaution to make sure something doesn’t happen again, we should assess what degree of control is healthy. There will always be some things, no matter how carefully we plan, that happen unexpectedly, and the only thing we can do is wait it out.

4. You’re not alone.

When your problems feel unbearable, it’s easy to become attached to them and focus only on your own pain. But if you take a good look around, you’ll come to realize that you’re not alone. Someone else in the world is also still up at 3 AM because their thoughts are consuming them. Someone else, just like you, is trying hard to make it through another day without collapsing. People aren’t robots. That’s why we face all the confusion and hurt, but also the happiness and victories for times we never thought we’d ever get through, but did.

5. It’s okay to break, but when you’re ready, starting over is always worth it.

You have to be in the right mindset to start over. And if you’re not there yet, it’s okay. Continue breaking until there’s nothing left to break. But when the breaking gets old, a switch will turn on inside of you, and you’ll want to get off the couch and face the world again. Things have a habit of coming around when we least expect it. These are the best coincidences that we have to run with when they show up.

 

What do you think?

What do you do to keep holding on? Psych2Go would love to hear your thoughts! Please be sure to leave a comment down below!

 

Want to say hello or send a personal message? You can reach the author at catherine@psych2go.net. ♥

 

If you enjoyed this article, then you may also like 5 Reasons Why You Don’t Need to Be Afraid of Therapy or 5 Ways to Stay Motivated Once You’re Ready to Do Something.

 

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References:

11 Things to Remember When Everything Falls Apart. (2018). Power of Positivity. Retrieved April 5, 2018.

Hushka, J. (2017, May 9). 9 Uplifting Truths to Remember When You Feel Your Life is Falling Apart. Thought Catalog. Retrieved April 5, 2018.

R. (2018). 6 Things to Remember When Your Life Seems to be Falling Apart. Lifehacks. Retrieved April 5, 2018.

3 Comments

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  1. This amazing article really helped me. I lost my Gran and broke up with my partner recently. Each day is different. Some are totally fine, some are black. Thank you for writing this and reminding me other people feel near to collapsing each day.

  2. When she left me I raged against the darkness, sat up nights unable to stop the tears. Now two months later I’m up again, at 3am, but there are good days in between. Days I can even go more than five minutes without her on my mind. Guess you’re right.

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Written by Catherine Huang

Catherine Huang graduated from the University of Rhode Island with a BA in English. She has a penchant for storytelling, ramen, and psychology. Catherine is a writer for Psych2Go and looks forward to reaching out to its growing community, hoping to encourage others to tap into self-examination and confront life's challenges head on with the most difficult questions.

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